The parable of Kasia and David

It's the time of the year, or I guess it's one of TWO times in the year when I get really introspective about what exactly it is I'm doing here. I like to tell people that my life is all about reducing stress. And in that way I have been quite successful, but now is the time of year I feel the most stress. When I see the inequality and backwardness of the system here, the system that I enable, it makes me sad. Let me splain.

Lo, these great many years ago in the time of our forefathers at Seokang College Kasia and David, instructors in the righteous tongue of the Anglos, were moved toward an idea. They sought solace for their young apprentices from the rigors of final examinations in elective courses such as the righteous tongue of the Anglos. Such solace that they might strive to better themselves in the skills of their majors. Verily the wise instructors Kasia and David didst offer their final examinations in the week preceeding final examination week. This brought about exceeding great joy! The students exalted in spiritual delight for they achieved glorius grades in their majors and their works were chronicled in song. Parents sung the praises of Seokang College. College teachers delighted in the progressions of their young charges. College administrators revelled in abundant registration. Truly great joy did pervade.

Then, as is wont to happen, the Korean teachers did espy what the wise instructors Kasia and David were about and they coveted. They coveted that through their efforts the great and wise instructors, Kasia and David, did gain approbation of the people, (not to mention seven extra days with which to practice leisure of their choice). They were moved to derision and scorn. There was multitudinous backbiting and gnashing of teeth.

So it came to pass that in great dereliction of duty and their apprentices, Korean teachers did usurp the examination dates of that week before examination week and didst experience a surfeit of leisure. And there was much suffering at Seokang College. Students had narry enough time to prepare for major tests and did perform poorly. Then disheartened and spent they did bomb their examinations in elective studies such as the righteous tongue of the Anglos. Parents seethed at the failure of their progeny. Administrators trembled and quaked in fear of failing enrollment.

And so it followed that Seokang experienced great famine. And in despair for his people the great Pharoh of Seokang, Park, decreed that henceforward students grades shall not drop below the mean line regardless of effort or performance and instructors shall suckle their students on milk and sweet honey sparing them the meat that is hard to chew. And once again Seokang flourished. But the great instructors Kasia and David did never again deliver examinations in that week prior to exam week. And students did never again achieve the greatness that once was.

Thus is the parable of Seokang and the great instructors Kasia and David. Thus saith the Lord.

Anyway, I'm still giving exams next week during exam week and everywhere I look this week I see Korean teachers giving their exams. My students are already telling me how depressed they are about bad marks. And in their depression they'll sleep, they'll drink soju, they'll call home and cry, they'll do just about anything but study for MY exam.

What I've tried to do this week is use it as a week of marking homework assignments and giving a review/hints for the final exam. I do that in the first hour. Then I give the students the next class off because it is the good students who made it to the first class. Only the bad students will miss the homework check and exam hints. But I go to class anyway just in case some stragglers show up who don't know the others have the class off. Then I check their homework and give them a watered down review/test hints. This is the ONLY reward the good students here get for being good. In every other way the BAD students are rewarded. This is what makes me question myself every year.

Next week I'll give exams and I'll be marking them getting more and more depressed. Some of my good students will ace the exam thereby earning every mark they get. They'll get like 95%, 90%, scores like that. But in every class there will be the bad students who somehow manage to get like 3% or 10%. What will happen is their scores will be jacked up to 70 so they get an extra 60% for being lazyass slackers while my good students get an extra 5 or 10% for being awesome. The moral? Don't try, it's not worth it. And by teaching here I ENABLE this non-education. This depresses me twice a year.

However, on the plus side I am planning a vacation to try to put this out of my mind. I think I'm finally going to make it to Angkor Wat! I'm gonna go to Pattaya and golf a bit and from there there are tours to Angkor Wat. Then if time and money permit I'm gonna try to get to Halong Bay in Viet Nam. I'm sure that'll make me forget about how crappy I'm gonna feel for all my best students this session. And at least this week I have given them a class or two off. That's all they get for coming to class every day, listening, taking notes, doing their homework and doing the right thing.

Sigh.