And with that title I'm gonna have to admit I'm playing right into his hands and giving him just a little bit more internet buzz. I'm not sure if he's trying to be serious yet or if he's just a shockblogger. Or shock columnist. But for the love of GOD!!! If anyone TRIED to make a stupider list of things foreigners like about Korea, I don't know if they could. Hmmmm, maybe I should try. It is my destiny.
Aside from number 1, which I mostly agree with, I can't get through this list without being overcome with this strange sensation that I can only describe as my body deciding between laughter and vomit.
What I am going to do is discuss his list, give my genuine list, (and not assume that it is agreed upon by all expats here in Korea), and try my best to create a shockingly stupid list that I think would shock and anger people into reading my blog and be worse than Jon Huer. That'll be the hard part.
Huer #1. Street Safety. I agree. The streets are safe. From crime. I don't feel like I'm going to get mugged as I walk down the street anywhere in Korea. I've never seen a gun or person with a gun except a soldier at the DMZ. And you just don't get the kids that are so bored they decide to vandalize or terrorize. And if it was anything but video games and hagwons that was keeping the kids busy I'd say kudos to Korea for that. But driving or even walking in those streets is dangerous. And if you get hit by a car you are pretty much left to your own devices to solve the problem. Police, ambulance, hospital and fire services are abysmal. But yeah I agree.
My #1 K.B.O. The Korean Baseball Organization.
My shockblogger #1 The way people of other blood are treated as absolute equals by all Koreans.
Huer #2 The sweetness and charitable disposition of Korean women over 60. I gotta say I like the ajjumas. But sweet? Charitable? Holy shit! Has this guy never stood in line to get on a bus or buy a ticket or pay for food or any fucking line in the country. The ajjuma elbow will get them right to the front. And people never do anything. It's accepted. Would YOU argue with that lady? There's a reason why the term "ajjumonster" was created by foreigners and the phrase, "third sex" was coined by locals. They are something to see. And the salmon-like metamorphosis from "beautiful, cute, quiet, anassuming, bashful, shrinking violet" agashi to ajjuma is a biology study just waiting to happen.
My #2 Drinking culture. I love being able to walk around outside with a beer. Show up for work hungover, they UNDERSTAND. (not that I ever would...) And there is always beer close by. You don't need to get it at a beer store. Drinking customs, drinking games, drinking songs, I love everything about the Korean drinking culture except soju.
My shockblogger #2 The intrepid Korean mosquito. These voracious little vixens are a superspecies of nature to be revered. Korean national treasure #564.
Huer #3 Korea's countryside people's unique attitude toward foreigners. Is he referring to how they demand, "Hey! Hello!" And then when you acquiesce, "Hi." they laugh their asses off? It's not unique since lots of people drive by herds of cattle, moo out the window and laugh their asses off when the cattle reply. But I suppose it IS a unique attitude toward PEOPLE.
My #3 Korean food. Nuff said.
My shockblogger #3 The lovely holiday togetherness one experiences on highways and thoroughfares throughout the country during Chuseok and other national holidays.
Huer #4 The Korean fighting spirit. Refusing to accept fate or impossibility. The Korean heart seethes at injustice. They have a pretty easy time accepting MY impossibilities. Like getting my visa renewed without leaving the country. Impossible! #5 pizza with olives, green pepper and mushroom instead of boiled egg, corn and sweet pickle. Impossible. Transferring money without producing my passport. Impossible. Cutting the hair on the top of my balding head. Impossible. All those things were in fact possible, (and I had them done), but those and MANY others are termed "impossible" when somebody just doesn't feel like doing their job. Probly hungover because of the drinking culture. And as for seething hearts is that what you call that shit-eating grin they give you when they reneg on promises in the contract while reminding you that YOU are still bound by it till the end of the year?
My #4 Winter, spring and fall. Not too hot, not too cold. Juuust right.
My shockblogger #4 The healthy, sauna-like conditions in Korean summer when laundry can take a week to dry and 30 can feel like 50 degrees. Korea has four seasons you know.
Huer #5 Spontaneity Yes the Koreans I know make it a point to be spontaneous. In fact they pencil it into their busy schedules after Tae Kwon Do hagwon on Thursday from 5-6 PM and Noraebang on Friday from 9-10. Or before sexual intercourse from 3-3:02 Sunday afternoon. The average Korean won't do anything spontaneous today except unnecessarily changing a lane. Without looking. But since it was done 75 times on their 10-minute commute to work, yes they are spontaneous.
My #5 It's a cheap place to live. Mostly because the good teaching contracts come with housing but I can save a lot more here than anywhere else I've lived. And I don't skimp either.
My shockblogger #5 The pleasant introspection and single-mindedness of purpose Koreans engage in that is so accute they can sometimes transcend their surroundings. Like when they are choosing gochujang with their shopping cart blocking the entire aisle for 10 minutes. When they walk across the road during the don't walk signal with their thoughtful gaze skyward. Or when they slam their article down on the check-out counter, get into a taxi or bark their order out when you are in front of them in line.
Huer #6 Lyrical songs of Korea. I have to admit if he's talking about "Bong JJack" or "Trote" music, it IS something uniquely Korean and, like Reggae, it's hard to feel sad when you're on the bus or buying a sweet potato on the street and hear it. At least for me. Bong Boing ba Boing. I WILL buy a CD before I go home. Who am I kidding I'll download some.
My #6 The babes. (externally). They are nice to look at until that tragic agashi-->ajjuma stage.
My shockblogger #6 The awesome, well thought out, intricately poetic, highly sophisticated Korean pop music. Not to mention the ingenious choreography that invariably goes with it.
Huer #7 Sense of humour and gaiety. Someone called Koreans the Irish of the East. I can't even finish this one. Korean humour is as clever as a sack of hammers. At any given time in Korea you can turn on the TV and there'll be a "gagman" dressed as a woman, pulling an exaggerated face or falling down. Pure genius! There is no political humour, wordplay, wit. Make yourself or someone else look stupid and you're hilarious. When I was living in Seoul a TV producer asked me to play a comedic character on TV. Even had a contract. I refused with relish for this reason. And I gave up teaching lessons involving jokes or humour a LONG time ago. I'll leave the "gaiety" part alone.
My #7 The mountains. There IS some good hiking to be had here.
My shockblogger #7 The lovely, helpful people and solid organization at every immigration office throughout the land.
Huer #8 Pansori. There's no real way to describe it, (or enjoy it). You just have to witness it. Okay, okay, yes the singers make huge sacrifices to get their throats into shape for the songs. If they were singing the high note from Boston's More Than a Feeling THAT I could appreciate! But I guess if a guy's looking for a cool and pretty slack job you can't do much better than a Pansori drummer.
My #8 I Tae Won Not for the shopping. I Tae Won is like a U.N. meeting every night. It's a great place to meet interesting people and they DO have pubs there. And although they're expensive you can find some great restaurants there too. My favourite place in Korea to eat drink, play pool and sometimes get my funk on.
My shockblogger #8 The myriad friendly, hospitable souls you can meet, share a pint or play darts or pool with at all the fine pubs across Korea.
Huer #9 The way the lower class is treated. Koreans are extraordinarily forgiving toward those less fortunate than themselves. This one actually made me a bit angry! Forgiving!?!? We forgive you for being the underpaid scum who make US rich. The thing is, and this is a good thing about Korea, I don't see many less fortunate people. However, you are less important than me if you have less money. Belee dat shit!
My #9 Everland I've been there about 6 or 7 times and will go a few more before I leave Korea I'm sure.
My shockblogger #9 The ingenius "undol" floor heating and the coziness of sitting on the comfortable, piping hot, cement floor while entertaining guests, drinking or eating and the wonderful tingly sensation in the lower extremities that comes with it.
Huer #10 The noteworthy achievement of being able to create new English words and concepts. Konglish. "Skinship" is the one and only achievement of note I can think of in this category. The annoying, confusing, nonsensical, and downright stupid achievements in this field: unending.
My #10 Friends Although there are many losers who come here to work and genuinely unlikeable people who live here, I have made some good friends in my years in Korea.
My shockblogger #10 It really should be number one but since it is integral in all the top 10 best things about Korea, (except the mosquitoes and the weather), I put the highly advanced, education system as my number 10.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Dust Defence
March is nearly over and most likely so are all my positive entries to be found here and Facebook. The mogies are back. I'm not the only one blogging about them either. Mosquitoes are of another kind here and the season seems endless. But the oppressive heat and the bloodsuckers are going to be accompanied by the worst Chinese sand season ever here I think. I think that way because it's only just coming up to April and I've felt the effects of the sand for a month already. And yellow dust levels have been low in Gwangju. But I'm pretty sure that's what's been ailing me lately.
I've been snorting Otrivin when nasal CLOGGING, (caps for Heather's benefit), has been at its worst but it hasn't done diddly to reduce chest congestion, the half hour morning hackfest or the BUCKETS and BUCKETS, (again caps are for you Duder), of snotrags I've been producing. Nothing has helped me sleep through an entire night either. But yesterday I found another much sought after weapon in the war against the common cold that just might be as useful come the dust days of summer: "hot lemony Neo Citron." Well it's not Neo Citron but like Kleenex is tissue, in my mind Neo Citron is any cold medicine that comes in tea form.
I have been asking at yaks, (drugstores), all over Korea for this stuff for years and lo and behold I find it yesterday when I'm not even looking for it. I went into a yak close to the local supermarket to get some money from its bank machine. As I'm walking towards the machine out of the corner of my eye I caught a new display and sure enough, Theraflu!
I'm even happier about finding this that I was about the hot dog buns a couple weeks back. Sleep is pretty doggone important and when I don't get enough I don't feel like doing anything. I remember taking Neo Citron and being knocked, (the f), out! So last night, even though my symptoms were not at their worst, just because I had it, I made some late night lemon knockout tea. It worked like a charm! I got up at 8:30 today instead of the usual 4 or 5 and I didn't get up one time last night, instead of the usual 4 or 5. I feel great today! Good thing too cuz I have lots of work to do.
Yeah, I decided not to go to Kang Neung for the World Women's Curling Championships. I have quite a bit of copying, attendance making, and lesson planning to do for the upcoming week. Plus, because of the cherry blossom season, it's a nightmarish time to travel in Korea. And I'll save money and I can watch the games on TSN and get a better view and the campus here is just about ready to burst into bloom too and that's always nice to see. These are pics from cherry blossom season a few years ago when Kasia and I were both working here at Seogang.
It gets pretty spectacular around here. And I don't have to clean up all the petals. So I better use all the energy I got from that great sleep last night to get my work done. I gotta make good copies of all my attendance forms. All I have now are lists the kids made by signing a paper I passed around. I've been waiting for department heads to give me pictures of students so I can add them to the attendance but they hang onto their students pictures like I don't know, manhole covers. That doesn't make any cents does it. Har har har. Yehaw, Theraflu! Good drugs! Happy springtime everybody!
I've been snorting Otrivin when nasal CLOGGING, (caps for Heather's benefit), has been at its worst but it hasn't done diddly to reduce chest congestion, the half hour morning hackfest or the BUCKETS and BUCKETS, (again caps are for you Duder), of snotrags I've been producing. Nothing has helped me sleep through an entire night either. But yesterday I found another much sought after weapon in the war against the common cold that just might be as useful come the dust days of summer: "hot lemony Neo Citron." Well it's not Neo Citron but like Kleenex is tissue, in my mind Neo Citron is any cold medicine that comes in tea form.
I have been asking at yaks, (drugstores), all over Korea for this stuff for years and lo and behold I find it yesterday when I'm not even looking for it. I went into a yak close to the local supermarket to get some money from its bank machine. As I'm walking towards the machine out of the corner of my eye I caught a new display and sure enough, Theraflu!
I'm even happier about finding this that I was about the hot dog buns a couple weeks back. Sleep is pretty doggone important and when I don't get enough I don't feel like doing anything. I remember taking Neo Citron and being knocked, (the f), out! So last night, even though my symptoms were not at their worst, just because I had it, I made some late night lemon knockout tea. It worked like a charm! I got up at 8:30 today instead of the usual 4 or 5 and I didn't get up one time last night, instead of the usual 4 or 5. I feel great today! Good thing too cuz I have lots of work to do.
Yeah, I decided not to go to Kang Neung for the World Women's Curling Championships. I have quite a bit of copying, attendance making, and lesson planning to do for the upcoming week. Plus, because of the cherry blossom season, it's a nightmarish time to travel in Korea. And I'll save money and I can watch the games on TSN and get a better view and the campus here is just about ready to burst into bloom too and that's always nice to see. These are pics from cherry blossom season a few years ago when Kasia and I were both working here at Seogang.
It gets pretty spectacular around here. And I don't have to clean up all the petals. So I better use all the energy I got from that great sleep last night to get my work done. I gotta make good copies of all my attendance forms. All I have now are lists the kids made by signing a paper I passed around. I've been waiting for department heads to give me pictures of students so I can add them to the attendance but they hang onto their students pictures like I don't know, manhole covers. That doesn't make any cents does it. Har har har. Yehaw, Theraflu! Good drugs! Happy springtime everybody!
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Dokdo--->Takeshima
Well Korea lost. Dokdo is no more! I will never call the above island Dokdo again. It is now Takeshima. Japan won it fair and square. Unfortunately I had to teach right at the crucial moment. It was about 2:10 when Korea pulled off their improbable comeback in the ninth inning. I had to see if they'd make it so I showed up late for my 2:00 class. But I didn't get to see the 2-run game winning single by Ichiro. Although my students got updated, on their cellphones, DURING CLASS, and told me. I didn't mind that much.
I was sad to see Korea lose. At first. But now I'm finding out exactly what happened. Men on first and third, Ichiro at the plate and a .220 hitter coming up next. ICHIRO who has more hits in a season than any ball player ever. More than Ty Cobb, Wade Boggs, Paul Molitor, Pete Rose! And he was already 3 for 5 in the game! THEN the guy on first STEALS!!! The American announcer was saying that the guy shouldn't steal cuz it takes the bat outta Ichiro's hands. Only if your manager and players haven't been told their whole lives how evil Japan is. Only if the batter isn't the guy who has been most vocal about how he enjoys beating Korea. Although I think that's been a bit blown out of proportion too. As things ALWAYS are here involving Japan. The worst I've heard that Ichiro said about Korea is that it smells like garlic. Have you been here? It DOES! They have chewing gum commercials on TV here where garlic/kimchi breath knocks people over until they pop in a piece of Zylitol.
Anyway, I will tell you I am absolutely not a fan of walking the bases loaded but in this case it would have been the smart thing to do. The obvious thing to do. It makes me wonder if the Japanese team was clever enough to actually TRY to take advantage of the emotional Koreans. I had been noticing signs throughout the tournament and actually blogged about some. Korean batters swinging at 3-0 pitches. That's a cardinal sin! Trying to stretch singles into doubles and steal bases when it just isn't smart to do so. These were all blunders committed against Japan. And in 4 games you notice things like these. Maybe the Japanese team had the brilliant strategy to try to use this over-emo against Korea. Kudos for them if they did! It worked.
After seeing pictures like this:
I said to myself, "Self, if Korea isn't going to man up and put their money where their stupid slogan chanting, flag-planting, sport-politicizing asses are, I'll do it for them!" and I determined that in MY mind the winner of the WBC would get ownership of what I knew then as Dokdo. And it seems fitting that Korea lost it by being overemotional, the way they have chosen to spearhead their campaign to get someone, ANYone else to recognize their claim to this island.
So I'm sorry, Korea. Dokdo is not yours. Takeshima is theirs. Try to take something positive from this. Geez, that's a laugh. Like asking them to see a sporting match between Korea and Japan of ANY kind not as another battle in a war but as a chance to improve relations between two historically opposed nations. Might as well ask them to stop breathing.
For anyone interested in a more detailed, VERY VERY detailed investigation of the Liancourt Rocks you can go to this amazing blog. From what I've read there it looks like Korea's case is pretty weak anyway. But I guess they're using it to unite Koreans, (like they need that), and test the "squeaky wheel gets the grease" theory simultaneously.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
It's quite a spring in Korea!
I can't decide what to do this coming weekend! I saw some of the first Magnolia trees blooming while walking to David and Angie's place on Saturday after the ball game we went to. Kia won the game 2-1 but there was precious little action. Only a couple of the regular starters played for Kia and there were only a few hits for each team. I think both runs scored on wild pitches too. That's just not a classic match-up for both David and Rebecca to have as their very first baseball game.
But there was kimbop, shrimp chips and chicken for all. And the weather held out. It looked a little like rain but that didn't start until we were safe inside the confines of D & A's batchelor pad that I have to say is pretty darn nice! We had a good chat and some kick-AZZ pizza. I was pretty worn out though after waking up at 6, walking to the batting cage and driving about 6000 won worth of balls left AND right handed, then consuming a box of chicken and five beers at the game so I had a couple pieces of pie and then I was a pumpkin. Judging from this pic I resembled a pumpkin more than I thought. Damn, I need some exercise! And this is AFTER a pretty good calory burning day!
Anyway the Sunday game was rained out but it turned out okay because the Korea/Venezuela game was on. Korea won 10-2! I watched the whole thing. Yoon Suk Min, the Kia Tiger pitcher, got the win too! It was awesome! In Gwangju Yoon Suk Min is known as the smiling ace. On one of the websites I keep up with, which is about Korean baseball, I predicted he'd win 20 games this season for Kia. I hope he wins 25! And he's 21 I think. My only fear is that the major leagues will scoop him up. So I was happy that he let some people hit and gave up 2 runs. Korea vs. Japan in the final! The winner keeps Dokdo! Who will the pitchers be? I sure hope Korea doesn't start the so-called Japan killer, Kim Kwang Hyun. Japan has killed him. He's just a young fella yet. He'll need at least another year to shoulder that much pressure. Probably a combination of Ryu, Bong and if they're smart, the guy I think has been the second best pitcher for them: Jong Hyun Wook. The Korean coaches just keep bringing him on for a few outs then yanking him for no aparent reason. Maybe he should START! Anyway, this is Yoon.
So now I have to decide what to do NEXT weekend. The Tigers are in town during the week. I think I could catch the Friday game. But I'm thinking of going to Kang Neung because the world Women's Curling Championships are there and the playoffs will be this coming weekend. I'm sure the Canadian Jones team will be in the midst of those. And if memory serves, immediately following Magnolia season in Korea is the beautiful cherry blossom time. Wouldn't it be a great pic to get the Canadian women's curling team to pose with the trophy underneath a big blooming cherry blossom tree! It's tempting.
Anyhoo, if I get that picture I'll be sure to post it here.
But there was kimbop, shrimp chips and chicken for all. And the weather held out. It looked a little like rain but that didn't start until we were safe inside the confines of D & A's batchelor pad that I have to say is pretty darn nice! We had a good chat and some kick-AZZ pizza. I was pretty worn out though after waking up at 6, walking to the batting cage and driving about 6000 won worth of balls left AND right handed, then consuming a box of chicken and five beers at the game so I had a couple pieces of pie and then I was a pumpkin. Judging from this pic I resembled a pumpkin more than I thought. Damn, I need some exercise! And this is AFTER a pretty good calory burning day!
Anyway the Sunday game was rained out but it turned out okay because the Korea/Venezuela game was on. Korea won 10-2! I watched the whole thing. Yoon Suk Min, the Kia Tiger pitcher, got the win too! It was awesome! In Gwangju Yoon Suk Min is known as the smiling ace. On one of the websites I keep up with, which is about Korean baseball, I predicted he'd win 20 games this season for Kia. I hope he wins 25! And he's 21 I think. My only fear is that the major leagues will scoop him up. So I was happy that he let some people hit and gave up 2 runs. Korea vs. Japan in the final! The winner keeps Dokdo! Who will the pitchers be? I sure hope Korea doesn't start the so-called Japan killer, Kim Kwang Hyun. Japan has killed him. He's just a young fella yet. He'll need at least another year to shoulder that much pressure. Probably a combination of Ryu, Bong and if they're smart, the guy I think has been the second best pitcher for them: Jong Hyun Wook. The Korean coaches just keep bringing him on for a few outs then yanking him for no aparent reason. Maybe he should START! Anyway, this is Yoon.
So now I have to decide what to do NEXT weekend. The Tigers are in town during the week. I think I could catch the Friday game. But I'm thinking of going to Kang Neung because the world Women's Curling Championships are there and the playoffs will be this coming weekend. I'm sure the Canadian Jones team will be in the midst of those. And if memory serves, immediately following Magnolia season in Korea is the beautiful cherry blossom time. Wouldn't it be a great pic to get the Canadian women's curling team to pose with the trophy underneath a big blooming cherry blossom tree! It's tempting.
Anyhoo, if I get that picture I'll be sure to post it here.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
PLAY BALL!
It's an exciting time in baseball right now. For me anyway. Korea is looking good in the World Baseball Classic, and since I am a regular at Kia Tigers games in the Korean Baseball Organization, I feel a kinship to these players and vote for them. Even though there are only two Tigers on the squad. In fact I'd almost be tempted to vote for them if they played the Canadian team. Almost.
But not only that, pre-season baseball is getting under way here. I gotta say baseball is something Korea does right. Pre-season games are free. They're not very well publicized or anything but I have been wandering by the ball park now and then to check on things and asking guards if they knew anything. I was sure it was getting close to baseball time.
Last Sunday I was sick but just had to get out of the house. I wasn't sure a walk would do me any good since I think it might be something in the air that is contributing to this sinus cold I've had for a month, but I had cabin fever. So I got my red-palmed gloves and a stack of 500won coins and decided to walk to the batting cages. I smacked the ball around pretty good. Even sick I'm dangerous with a baseball bat. Then, since the ball park is just a little ways away from the batting cages I ventured over. It was 11 am when I got there. I asked the guard if there was pre-season baseball on March 28th because there were lots of ads about something happening on March 28th. He recognized me from another time I had asked about baseball. He said, "No, concert. Today baseball." I thought he was asking if I was asking. I said, "Yeah baseball. When is baseball?" He repeated, "Today baseball." I'm using Korean and he's using English. This happens a lot for some reason. And if I speak English they speak Korean. That happens too. Weird.
So I said, "TODAY? What time?" He told me 1PM. Since I have no real responsibilities in my life, (gloat gloat), I just went in. I watched infield drills, and batting practice for both teams. I was like the ONLY guy there. Sitting in the best seat in the house eating ramyun and an egg sandwich, coughing, sneezing, blowing my nose. It was AWESOME! A couple of the players know me. I can't remember which ones cuz I was drinking soju with the Tiger cheerleaders the night I was introduced. Lost my baseball glove that night too. (The one in the picture) And I just can't find an adult baseball glove anywhere in Gwangju. Anyway, Byun Sun Woong, one of the catchers, and I talked a bit before the game on Sunday. I think he was one who met me. I'm pulling for him to get more playing time this year.
Around about 12:30 people started arriving. At various times during the game I had people sitting beside me but almost nobody walking in front of me at all. A few of the Tigers Superfans came up to me and renewed our acquaintences. They asked if I wanted to go out after the game for soju but I refused due to my cold. There were no cheerleaders so it was just folks naturally calling out cheers for the Tigers. It was a rare game for me at which I didn't drink but the other fans were partaking so they got more boistrous as the game went along. I couldn't yell very well because of my cold and the atmosphere was so casual I found I didn't need to. I just clapped and whistled when Kia did good stuff.
Yang Hyun Jong looked really good pitching almost 5 innings and giving up only 2 hits. He gave up a run due to an error and a couple walks but had a solid pre-season outing. Then the dreaded Son Young Min came on in relief. It was 1-1. I thought for SURE he'd blow the lead like he had done so often last year. But he was pretty solid. And the Tigers scored 4 runs in the bottom of his first inning and ended up getting him the win. The final score was 5-2. It looks like maybe Kia's relief pitching has improved. That was by FAR their weakest point as a team last year. So this is a GREAT sign for the season.
Lee Jong Beom and Lee Hyun Gon got a couple hits each and looked like they were in mid-season form. So did Lee Che Ju. So the Lees were looking good.
Choi Hee Seop got a solid base hit and looked a bit better than last year but MAN he takes some ugly swings at the plate! And his fielding is below average.
There was a good looking shortstop named An Chi Hong who I hadn't seen before. He got a hit and made a few really nice defensive plays. So that's a big plus too.
All in all it was a great way to spend a Sunday! I think next weekend the Woori Heroes are in town Saturday and Sunday so I'll be at the ballpark rain or shine. Or snow. I think maybe I'll bring some beer this time too. Can't wait!
Monday, March 16, 2009
Ooops
Oh.
Tee hee.
Well it just looked like a bunch of gobbledeegook while I was typing. Never used to be like that.
Geez now I have to go back and post pics I wanted to post with all these recent entries. And links. NAH!
Okay, just one. THIS
is the new 50,000 weon bill I wanted to put in my Insomnia post.
Tee hee.
Well it just looked like a bunch of gobbledeegook while I was typing. Never used to be like that.
Geez now I have to go back and post pics I wanted to post with all these recent entries. And links. NAH!
Okay, just one. THIS
is the new 50,000 weon bill I wanted to put in my Insomnia post.
Broken Blog
This is what happens when I try to post a pic.
This
is what happens when I try to post a link.
What has happened to my blog???
Sunday, March 08, 2009
Korean players of note in the World Baseball Classic
One of the things I really love about Korea is baseball. The Korean Baseball Organization, (KBO), is going to start exhibition games later this month and starts in early April. So I, as usual, am pumped about my favourite team, the Kia Tigers', chances this year again. I might do a rundown of the Kia Tigers staff on here but for now I will bring all you folks up to date on the players you'll be seeing soon since they made it through today to the second round. They have a rematch with Japan tomorrow which I think they might lose but probably not as badly as they lost the first game to them. They'll likely start a better pitcher. And with any luck they'll make some adjustments to the lineup that I think they should make. Almost all these guys are players in the KBO who I get to watch all season long. I'm looking forward to it.
Pitchers
Bong Jung Keun -LG- Played in the majors. One of many pitchers to have shoulder surgery, lose velocity, then come home to Korea to pitch in the KBO. He had 140 strikeouts and an ERA of 2.66 in '08. For LG that's VERY respectable. Pitched 4 disastrous innings in Beijing vs. Taipei. 9 hits, 6 runs and 3 walks. But pitched 3 innings vs. Taipei in W.B.C. and gave up 2 hits, no runs.
Jeong Dae Hyeon -SK- Won 20 games in '05. Submarine style. There are better pitchers not in Japan. I don't know why he's there. He may not be used at all. Maybe he's there to pitch against a big name player who hates submariners. ???
Hwang Doo Sung -Woori- He was spectacular qualifying for Beijing but left off the roster. Pitched 5.1 innings got 8 strikeouts and gave up no runs. He might be the starter for Japan/Korea II. If not he'll be available if the starter gets shelled early.
Im Tae Hoon -Doosan- Rookie of the year in '07 but struggled a bit near the end of '08 and was replaced by Yoon Suk Min, a better pitcher, for the Olympic team. Pitched 2 innings vs. Taipei and gave up 2 hits and 2 walks but didn't give up a run and struck out 3.
Jang Won Sam -Woori- I like his number, 13, it's one sam like his name. (Sam is Korean for 3). '06 KBO Rookie of the year runner up and 2nd in strikeouts with 142. Shut out China for 4 innings and threw a complete game shutout vs. Holland in Beijing. W.B.C. vs. Japan he pitched 2.1 innings and gave up 4 hits, 3 runs and 3 walks. But he did strike out 2.
Jong Hyun Wook -Samsung- He was the only one who didn't give up runs every inning he pitched against Japan. Cleaned up the "Japan Killer"'s mess in the 3rd and got two solid outs in the 4th before the coaches decided he was pitching too well so they yanked him. 1 and 2/3 innings pitched, 0 runs, 1 strikeout.
Kim Kwang Hyun -SK- '08 strikeout title, gold glove, pitcher of the year, 1.26 E.R.A. Young and handsome. No question he is the golden boy of Korean baseball. His nickname is the "Japan Killer" for his efforts in Beijing. No question he did well but people seem to forget he was losing his first game against Japan when he left. It was Yoon Suk Min, a better pitcher, who got the win in that one. But people still give him credit for the win. However he DID pitch 8 strong innings for the win in Korea/Japan II. The thing is he's an inconsistant pitcher for SK. He's young! So it didn't surprise me much when Japan shelled him at the W.B.C. 1.1 innings pitched, 7 hits, 8 runs, 2 walks, 3 strikeouts.
Lee Jae Woo -Doosan- This is who replaced Jong in the game vs. Japan and he looked pretty ugly. 2 innings pitched, 3 hits, 3 runs including a homer to Johjima.
Lee Seung Ho -SK- He was rookie of the year in 2000. Now he's just a relief pitcher. He threw an inning vs. Taipei and got a strikeout without giving up a run.
Lim Chang Yong - Plays for the Yakult Swallows in Japan. In '08 he had 33 saves and a 3.00 E.R.A. with 50 K's in 51 innings. He'll be the closer. He was brought in very cheekily when Korea had a 14-0 lead over China and two out in the final inning. He got the out. Korea's not making any friends doing crap like that.
Oh Seung Hwan -Samsung- Gets a lot of saves. 40+ saves in '06 and '07. Save vs. Cuba in Beijing. I think he'll be a set-up man for Lim. Haven't seen him yet.
Ryu Hyun Jin -Hanhwa- '06 Rookie of the year. '06/'07 strikeout king. May have been Korea's best pitcher in Beijing. 17.1 innings pitched, 2 runs, 13 strikeouts and 2 wins including a complete game 1-0 shutout vs. Canada, (that I hated watching), and 8 1/3 solid innings vs. Cuba for the gold. He might be back for Korea/Japan II cuz he only pitched 3 innings against Taipei giving up 1 hit and 2 walks while striking out 3.
Son Min Han -Lotte- He's a solid pitcher. He won't pitch any gems and he'll give up runs but he'll get wins. I like him for long relief.
Yoon Suk Min -Kia- I may be biased but I think this is the best Korea has to offer when it comes to pitching. If Ryu wasn't Korea's best in Beijing, Yoon was. He got wins vs. the U.S. and Japan. He got a save against Taipei, a hold vs. Cuba, and he got a save in Japan/Korea II. So his stats against Japan are better than the "Japan Killer"'s! I spent last season watching him pitch gem after gem only to get the ball taken away and given to a crappy relief staff on Kia who lost a lot of his games for him. STILL he managed to win 14 games and come 2nd in E.R.A. in the league last year with 2.33. Today in the W.B.C. he routinely shut out China for 6 innings giving up 2 hits and striking out 5. He's undervalued.
Catchers
Kang Min Ho -Lotte- I think he's the better catcher at the plate. He really works the pitcher and gets a lot of walks. 2 plate appearances so far and one walk.
Park Kyung Oan -SK- His name should be spelled "Wan" not "Oan". Maybe he calls a good game cuz he's not impressive at the plate. 1/7 with 2 strikeouts, a walk and one RBI.
Infielders
Choi Jeong -SK- The only non-pitcher we haven't seen yet.
Jeong Keun Woo -SK- He's an average second baseman. I hate him because he got the homerun that beat Canada 1-0 in Beijing but I still think they could have found a better 2B. 3/9 4 runs, 2 RBI, a walk and a strikeout.
Kim Tae Kyun -Hanhwa- This guy's a monster. '08 he got 31 homers in the KBO, which lead the league. He also had a .324 avg. I didn't like it when he swung on a 3-0 pitch in the first Japan game of the W.B.C., but he got a 2-run homer so... 3/8 4 runs, 5 RBI, 3 walks.
Ko Young Min -Doosan- Being used sparingly. He's 0/2 so far.
Lee Bum Ho -Hanhwa- He's only had three at bats but might get more. 1/2 2 runs, 3 RBI, walk.
Lee Dae Ho -Lotte- Another monster! I like him better than Kim Tae Kyun. Even though he kills the Tigers. Won the KBO triple crown in '06. That's avg., homers and RBI. He was .360 with 3 HR 5 runs and 10 RBI in Beijing. 3/6 1 run, 2 RBI and 2 walks so far. But he'll get more.
Park Ki Hyuk -Lotte- I think he looks, (and hits), like a little boy. There must be 10 better shortstops in the KBO. 2/10 1 run, 3 RBI and a strikeout.
Outfield
Choo Shin Soo -Cleveland- "Big League Choo". He plays in Cleveland and was player of the month of September in '08. So he might turn out to be a good Korean major leaguer. He's only the DH in the W.B.C. and not doing so well. 1/7 3 runs, 1 walk and a strikeout.
Kim Hyun Soo -Doosan- Most hits, (168), and best average, (.357) in the KBO in '08. Hit .370 in Beijing and is doing awesome in the W.B.C. so far too. But like a lot of the Koreans he's playing with a bit too much swagger. He swung on a 3-0 pitch and got out vs. China and tried to stretch a single into a double vs. Japan. If he hadn't, Kim's homer would have tied the game. 5/11 3 runs, 1 RBI, 2 walks and a strikeout.
Lee Jin Young -LG- This guy is me! He hits a ton but very level so watch for some screaming line drives when he's up. He's in RF cuz he used to be a pitcher and has a rocket for an arm. He gets lots of assists. Hit .333 in Beijing. Got a grand slam in Korea's opening game vs. Chinese Taipei in the W.B.C. 3/8 2 runs, 5 RBI, 1 walk.
Lee Jong Wook -Doosan- Blazing speed. Playoff MVP 2 years in a row for Doosan. He gets lots of runs and lots of stolen bases. But can't do either if he's not hitting. And he's NOT. I think he needs to be replaced by Lee Yong Gyu. 2/9 3 runs, 2 RBI, 3 walks, 2 strikeouts.
Lee Taek Keun -Woori- One of my favourite players. I once saw a weekend series where he went 5/5 on Saturday and 3/4 on Sunday against the Tigers. The colour commentator on MLBTV is in love with his swing. I've seen him play short. I'd swap him for Park Ki Hyuk next game. MUCH better bat. Only had one at bat so far and lined out.
Lee Yong Gyu -Kia- The only other Tiger. He is the best position player on Kia. I think he's just as fast as Lee Jong Wook. Another overlooked contributor to Beijing. He made a difference in almost every game. Hit a measley .481 and scored 8 runs. He's just been subbed for fielding and running so far. Hasn't hit yet but has scored a run. He just has an effect every time he plays. Put him in, coach!
So that's the lineup this year. There are glaring omissions like Lee Seung Yeop, Park Chan Ho, Seo Jae Eung, Lee Jong Beom and cases could be made for many others. But it's like that everywhere I'm sure. I was told that negotiations to get TV rights to show these games on Korean TV broke down. Imagine Korea/Japan negotiations breaking down. So anyways I have to watch really crappy streams of them. But I've seen most of all the games. And I'm looking forward to seeing these guys in real life when the pre-season games start at the end of this month! Can't wait. See you at the ball park sports fans!
Pitchers
Bong Jung Keun -LG- Played in the majors. One of many pitchers to have shoulder surgery, lose velocity, then come home to Korea to pitch in the KBO. He had 140 strikeouts and an ERA of 2.66 in '08. For LG that's VERY respectable. Pitched 4 disastrous innings in Beijing vs. Taipei. 9 hits, 6 runs and 3 walks. But pitched 3 innings vs. Taipei in W.B.C. and gave up 2 hits, no runs.
Jeong Dae Hyeon -SK- Won 20 games in '05. Submarine style. There are better pitchers not in Japan. I don't know why he's there. He may not be used at all. Maybe he's there to pitch against a big name player who hates submariners. ???
Hwang Doo Sung -Woori- He was spectacular qualifying for Beijing but left off the roster. Pitched 5.1 innings got 8 strikeouts and gave up no runs. He might be the starter for Japan/Korea II. If not he'll be available if the starter gets shelled early.
Im Tae Hoon -Doosan- Rookie of the year in '07 but struggled a bit near the end of '08 and was replaced by Yoon Suk Min, a better pitcher, for the Olympic team. Pitched 2 innings vs. Taipei and gave up 2 hits and 2 walks but didn't give up a run and struck out 3.
Jang Won Sam -Woori- I like his number, 13, it's one sam like his name. (Sam is Korean for 3). '06 KBO Rookie of the year runner up and 2nd in strikeouts with 142. Shut out China for 4 innings and threw a complete game shutout vs. Holland in Beijing. W.B.C. vs. Japan he pitched 2.1 innings and gave up 4 hits, 3 runs and 3 walks. But he did strike out 2.
Jong Hyun Wook -Samsung- He was the only one who didn't give up runs every inning he pitched against Japan. Cleaned up the "Japan Killer"'s mess in the 3rd and got two solid outs in the 4th before the coaches decided he was pitching too well so they yanked him. 1 and 2/3 innings pitched, 0 runs, 1 strikeout.
Kim Kwang Hyun -SK- '08 strikeout title, gold glove, pitcher of the year, 1.26 E.R.A. Young and handsome. No question he is the golden boy of Korean baseball. His nickname is the "Japan Killer" for his efforts in Beijing. No question he did well but people seem to forget he was losing his first game against Japan when he left. It was Yoon Suk Min, a better pitcher, who got the win in that one. But people still give him credit for the win. However he DID pitch 8 strong innings for the win in Korea/Japan II. The thing is he's an inconsistant pitcher for SK. He's young! So it didn't surprise me much when Japan shelled him at the W.B.C. 1.1 innings pitched, 7 hits, 8 runs, 2 walks, 3 strikeouts.
Lee Jae Woo -Doosan- This is who replaced Jong in the game vs. Japan and he looked pretty ugly. 2 innings pitched, 3 hits, 3 runs including a homer to Johjima.
Lee Seung Ho -SK- He was rookie of the year in 2000. Now he's just a relief pitcher. He threw an inning vs. Taipei and got a strikeout without giving up a run.
Lim Chang Yong - Plays for the Yakult Swallows in Japan. In '08 he had 33 saves and a 3.00 E.R.A. with 50 K's in 51 innings. He'll be the closer. He was brought in very cheekily when Korea had a 14-0 lead over China and two out in the final inning. He got the out. Korea's not making any friends doing crap like that.
Oh Seung Hwan -Samsung- Gets a lot of saves. 40+ saves in '06 and '07. Save vs. Cuba in Beijing. I think he'll be a set-up man for Lim. Haven't seen him yet.
Ryu Hyun Jin -Hanhwa- '06 Rookie of the year. '06/'07 strikeout king. May have been Korea's best pitcher in Beijing. 17.1 innings pitched, 2 runs, 13 strikeouts and 2 wins including a complete game 1-0 shutout vs. Canada, (that I hated watching), and 8 1/3 solid innings vs. Cuba for the gold. He might be back for Korea/Japan II cuz he only pitched 3 innings against Taipei giving up 1 hit and 2 walks while striking out 3.
Son Min Han -Lotte- He's a solid pitcher. He won't pitch any gems and he'll give up runs but he'll get wins. I like him for long relief.
Yoon Suk Min -Kia- I may be biased but I think this is the best Korea has to offer when it comes to pitching. If Ryu wasn't Korea's best in Beijing, Yoon was. He got wins vs. the U.S. and Japan. He got a save against Taipei, a hold vs. Cuba, and he got a save in Japan/Korea II. So his stats against Japan are better than the "Japan Killer"'s! I spent last season watching him pitch gem after gem only to get the ball taken away and given to a crappy relief staff on Kia who lost a lot of his games for him. STILL he managed to win 14 games and come 2nd in E.R.A. in the league last year with 2.33. Today in the W.B.C. he routinely shut out China for 6 innings giving up 2 hits and striking out 5. He's undervalued.
Catchers
Kang Min Ho -Lotte- I think he's the better catcher at the plate. He really works the pitcher and gets a lot of walks. 2 plate appearances so far and one walk.
Park Kyung Oan -SK- His name should be spelled "Wan" not "Oan". Maybe he calls a good game cuz he's not impressive at the plate. 1/7 with 2 strikeouts, a walk and one RBI.
Infielders
Choi Jeong -SK- The only non-pitcher we haven't seen yet.
Jeong Keun Woo -SK- He's an average second baseman. I hate him because he got the homerun that beat Canada 1-0 in Beijing but I still think they could have found a better 2B. 3/9 4 runs, 2 RBI, a walk and a strikeout.
Kim Tae Kyun -Hanhwa- This guy's a monster. '08 he got 31 homers in the KBO, which lead the league. He also had a .324 avg. I didn't like it when he swung on a 3-0 pitch in the first Japan game of the W.B.C., but he got a 2-run homer so... 3/8 4 runs, 5 RBI, 3 walks.
Ko Young Min -Doosan- Being used sparingly. He's 0/2 so far.
Lee Bum Ho -Hanhwa- He's only had three at bats but might get more. 1/2 2 runs, 3 RBI, walk.
Lee Dae Ho -Lotte- Another monster! I like him better than Kim Tae Kyun. Even though he kills the Tigers. Won the KBO triple crown in '06. That's avg., homers and RBI. He was .360 with 3 HR 5 runs and 10 RBI in Beijing. 3/6 1 run, 2 RBI and 2 walks so far. But he'll get more.
Park Ki Hyuk -Lotte- I think he looks, (and hits), like a little boy. There must be 10 better shortstops in the KBO. 2/10 1 run, 3 RBI and a strikeout.
Outfield
Choo Shin Soo -Cleveland- "Big League Choo". He plays in Cleveland and was player of the month of September in '08. So he might turn out to be a good Korean major leaguer. He's only the DH in the W.B.C. and not doing so well. 1/7 3 runs, 1 walk and a strikeout.
Kim Hyun Soo -Doosan- Most hits, (168), and best average, (.357) in the KBO in '08. Hit .370 in Beijing and is doing awesome in the W.B.C. so far too. But like a lot of the Koreans he's playing with a bit too much swagger. He swung on a 3-0 pitch and got out vs. China and tried to stretch a single into a double vs. Japan. If he hadn't, Kim's homer would have tied the game. 5/11 3 runs, 1 RBI, 2 walks and a strikeout.
Lee Jin Young -LG- This guy is me! He hits a ton but very level so watch for some screaming line drives when he's up. He's in RF cuz he used to be a pitcher and has a rocket for an arm. He gets lots of assists. Hit .333 in Beijing. Got a grand slam in Korea's opening game vs. Chinese Taipei in the W.B.C. 3/8 2 runs, 5 RBI, 1 walk.
Lee Jong Wook -Doosan- Blazing speed. Playoff MVP 2 years in a row for Doosan. He gets lots of runs and lots of stolen bases. But can't do either if he's not hitting. And he's NOT. I think he needs to be replaced by Lee Yong Gyu. 2/9 3 runs, 2 RBI, 3 walks, 2 strikeouts.
Lee Taek Keun -Woori- One of my favourite players. I once saw a weekend series where he went 5/5 on Saturday and 3/4 on Sunday against the Tigers. The colour commentator on MLBTV is in love with his swing. I've seen him play short. I'd swap him for Park Ki Hyuk next game. MUCH better bat. Only had one at bat so far and lined out.
Lee Yong Gyu -Kia- The only other Tiger. He is the best position player on Kia. I think he's just as fast as Lee Jong Wook. Another overlooked contributor to Beijing. He made a difference in almost every game. Hit a measley .481 and scored 8 runs. He's just been subbed for fielding and running so far. Hasn't hit yet but has scored a run. He just has an effect every time he plays. Put him in, coach!
So that's the lineup this year. There are glaring omissions like Lee Seung Yeop, Park Chan Ho, Seo Jae Eung, Lee Jong Beom and cases could be made for many others. But it's like that everywhere I'm sure. I was told that negotiations to get TV rights to show these games on Korean TV broke down. Imagine Korea/Japan negotiations breaking down. So anyways I have to watch really crappy streams of them. But I've seen most of all the games. And I'm looking forward to seeing these guys in real life when the pre-season games start at the end of this month! Can't wait. See you at the ball park sports fans!
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
Insomnia
I guess it's another sign of old age. I just can't seem to string together more than 3 or 4 hours of sleep. I had a good 40 years of awesome sleep though. I guess I'm pretty lucky. So it's 4 am on a Wednesday and I've been up reading news. It's the last thing I should be doing if I want to go back to sleep. News just makes me angrier and angrier and keeps me awake. But even worse, Korean news.
Since coming here in '96 there has been a constant barrage of stories circulating amongst the expats here that just make you shake your head. "Things that make you go WHAAA?" as they are called on http://www.seoulpodcast.com/page/2, a virtual goldmine of these stories. On some occasions they manage to leak out to the rest of the world but as hinted in last post, Koreans are very concerned about LOOKING not BEING civilized so they tend to try to downplay these stories and squash them before they affect Korea's global standing. That is, before they cost Korea money. In a perfect world, I suppose, the economically advanced countries should also be the most socially and morally advanced countries as well. I think globalization will bring us closer to this ideal. Which means Korea has to really step it up socially or their economy will take a dive. In my opinion, Korea was at its social best when I got here in '96 and is at its social worst right now. Yes, they are deteriorating. It's pretty obvious to me that Koreans are incapable of social change for the better. So long as they are economically stable. But when they fall on hard times they can put on a good show of fealty and global-mindedness. And we have seen them make promises to align themselves socially with other countries in their economic neighbourhood and we have seen them deliver on these promises - until financial stability was regained. Then back to the Korean ways. These shows will only fool the world so many times before it stops bailing Korea out. So rather than go the right way, reform, Korea looks like they might go the wrong way, isolationism. I think the idea of isolationism is gaining in popularity particularly when the possiblility of uniting with North Korea and no longer needing to outsource slave labour to people with non-Korean blood is looming. In fact they are probably in the midst of this disaster right now. I think we've seen Korea's glory days. But that's just my opinion. Why? Cuz I live here! And I can't escape these crazy stories.
A South Korean student in New Zealand stabbing his Japanese teacher in the back; A South Korean model not allowing her nude picture to be released in Japan; People given what the government, not they, considered fair payment for their homes which will be leveled to make richer Koreans richer, then some were killed by riot police during their protest; Actress Choi Jin Shil committing suicide after being rendered incapable of caring for her two daughters by her recently divorced husband, who was able to steal her fortune by Korean law; The suspension of the MUCH needed 50,000 weon note due to a map of Korea on the back that doesn't include Dokdo; Korean financial blogger "Minerva" jailed for being right about the recent economic collapse; ignorant treatment of dogs, mentally handicapped and women; these are all secondary. The issue that has me out of bed tonight is one that has been building at an alarming rate and one that for the first time has me a bit scared to be here. It's about sexual molestation.
The most famous case was of a Canadian guy named Christopher Neil who molested some Korean girls and was busted in Thailand and so on. This led to mass hysteria. It's now mandatory for all foreign workers to get criminal record checks that include a check to make sure you haven't committed this crime in your own country. Same thing happened with drugs. A foreigner or two was caught with them so they changed the laws. For foreigners. This I've blogged about before. It's not a bad thing to change these laws but it stems from racism, not any real concern for the victims. The whole time this was happening I couldn't help thinking that it was the old "blame-the-foreigners-for-the-ills-of-your-country" ploy. Not as much with the drugs but I was absolutely positive that Korea, a country that prizes martyrdom, and has a notorious hate on for foreigners would be a dangerous place if people started seeing how they could get a foreigner deported on a whim by claiming sexual molestation.
There was a very good episode of South Park where the kids got their parents taken away by social services by claiming they touched them improperly. No parents = paradise for the kids, right? They found that they actually missed their parents. Koreans are gonna find that if they start, (and it HAS started), going down this road they'll miss the foreign teachers. I've seen a few more teachers accused. And they always seem to be Canadian, dammit! I'm not saying that these teachers are necessarily innocent but I've taught Korean kids and I know Korean culture. The little kids are always jumping on teacher and kissing them goodbye or hugging them. It comes with the territory and is not discouraged the way it is in Canada.
Far be it from me to encourage prudery and discourage sexual freedom but although I have never witnessed sexual molestation at the schools where I've taught I've seen some very sketchy behavour and some VERY sketchy characters who I absolutely knew had ulterior motives for buying rounds of ice cream for the kids. Not foreigners. And I'm not going to get into it but there are some sexual tendencies in this culture that would make anyone from my country more than a little uncomfortable. SO it seems to me like some of the story is missing when I see the outrage at teachers who "touch students inappropriately". For God's sake because men are still dominant in this society through a system they call "hojeok", there is all kinds of inappropriate touching that goes on between female elders who are proud of young, male family members. And children are still spanked by teachers. This could very easily be done in sexually inappropriate ways. It makes me sick to talk about it.
But not as sick as the recent story about the 16-year-old girl who had been repeatedly raped, FOR 7 YEARS!, by three of her relatives. Two uncles and her grandfather. Do the math. They started when she was 9. So where is the moral outrage about THIS story? Has anybody outside Korea heard about it? Nope. Only through the blogs of us foreigners in Korea. And while there was a little bit of protest about it by Koreans, they quickly lost interest in it. The internet hits on the story dropped rapidly and died pretty fast.
These three guys went to trial and were found guilty of rape by Korean law. WHEW! Good! They'll certainly get what they deserve! Cuz this is an enlightened, civilized society and the laws are morally reasonable. RIGHT? These GUILTY men together served a grand total of zero days in jail! Nil. Nadda. Fuck all. And there's more. The victim was released back into their custody to be raped some more!!! There is even more. The girl was mentally disabled.
The inescapable conclusion, (and it's bolstered by other stories like U.S. soldiers abusing Korean women, so-called "comfort women" who were forced to have sex by Japanese during their occupation of Korea, and so on), the real outrage is not about the sex or the power dynamics, it's simply that Koreans don't like people sexually abusing Koreans - unless they are Korean.
I can't think of a clearer sign that Korea is a lost cause as far as globalization is concerned. But maybe I'm just cranky from not enough sleep. I don't know. Fuck. I work at a school where a majority of my students are young, pretty girls. I live in the same dorm as them. All any one of them has to do is say I was touching them incorrectly and who knows what might happen to me. Would my ten year career without any incidents be any defence? Doubt it. Would a parent or fellow student serve a day in jail for killing me? I doubt that too. But I'll tell you what, I personally know of a few incidents they've had with Korean teachers sexual misconduct here and not only were they not prosecuted, they were reinstated! Odds of that happening to me or any other foreigner under the same circumstances? Zero. Zip. Nadda. Fuck all.
Just feeling a little more vulnerable as a foreigner here in Korea. I had a picture of the new Korean 50,000 weon bill with an old Korean dude with his pants at his knees in the spot where national dignitaries usually appear. I thought it might be appropriate for this post. But for some reason I can't post pics or links here any more. Maybe I've been flagged by the Korean government already.
Since coming here in '96 there has been a constant barrage of stories circulating amongst the expats here that just make you shake your head. "Things that make you go WHAAA?" as they are called on http://www.seoulpodcast.com/page/2, a virtual goldmine of these stories. On some occasions they manage to leak out to the rest of the world but as hinted in last post, Koreans are very concerned about LOOKING not BEING civilized so they tend to try to downplay these stories and squash them before they affect Korea's global standing. That is, before they cost Korea money. In a perfect world, I suppose, the economically advanced countries should also be the most socially and morally advanced countries as well. I think globalization will bring us closer to this ideal. Which means Korea has to really step it up socially or their economy will take a dive. In my opinion, Korea was at its social best when I got here in '96 and is at its social worst right now. Yes, they are deteriorating. It's pretty obvious to me that Koreans are incapable of social change for the better. So long as they are economically stable. But when they fall on hard times they can put on a good show of fealty and global-mindedness. And we have seen them make promises to align themselves socially with other countries in their economic neighbourhood and we have seen them deliver on these promises - until financial stability was regained. Then back to the Korean ways. These shows will only fool the world so many times before it stops bailing Korea out. So rather than go the right way, reform, Korea looks like they might go the wrong way, isolationism. I think the idea of isolationism is gaining in popularity particularly when the possiblility of uniting with North Korea and no longer needing to outsource slave labour to people with non-Korean blood is looming. In fact they are probably in the midst of this disaster right now. I think we've seen Korea's glory days. But that's just my opinion. Why? Cuz I live here! And I can't escape these crazy stories.
A South Korean student in New Zealand stabbing his Japanese teacher in the back; A South Korean model not allowing her nude picture to be released in Japan; People given what the government, not they, considered fair payment for their homes which will be leveled to make richer Koreans richer, then some were killed by riot police during their protest; Actress Choi Jin Shil committing suicide after being rendered incapable of caring for her two daughters by her recently divorced husband, who was able to steal her fortune by Korean law; The suspension of the MUCH needed 50,000 weon note due to a map of Korea on the back that doesn't include Dokdo; Korean financial blogger "Minerva" jailed for being right about the recent economic collapse; ignorant treatment of dogs, mentally handicapped and women; these are all secondary. The issue that has me out of bed tonight is one that has been building at an alarming rate and one that for the first time has me a bit scared to be here. It's about sexual molestation.
The most famous case was of a Canadian guy named Christopher Neil who molested some Korean girls and was busted in Thailand and so on. This led to mass hysteria. It's now mandatory for all foreign workers to get criminal record checks that include a check to make sure you haven't committed this crime in your own country. Same thing happened with drugs. A foreigner or two was caught with them so they changed the laws. For foreigners. This I've blogged about before. It's not a bad thing to change these laws but it stems from racism, not any real concern for the victims. The whole time this was happening I couldn't help thinking that it was the old "blame-the-foreigners-for-the-ills-of-your-country" ploy. Not as much with the drugs but I was absolutely positive that Korea, a country that prizes martyrdom, and has a notorious hate on for foreigners would be a dangerous place if people started seeing how they could get a foreigner deported on a whim by claiming sexual molestation.
There was a very good episode of South Park where the kids got their parents taken away by social services by claiming they touched them improperly. No parents = paradise for the kids, right? They found that they actually missed their parents. Koreans are gonna find that if they start, (and it HAS started), going down this road they'll miss the foreign teachers. I've seen a few more teachers accused. And they always seem to be Canadian, dammit! I'm not saying that these teachers are necessarily innocent but I've taught Korean kids and I know Korean culture. The little kids are always jumping on teacher and kissing them goodbye or hugging them. It comes with the territory and is not discouraged the way it is in Canada.
Far be it from me to encourage prudery and discourage sexual freedom but although I have never witnessed sexual molestation at the schools where I've taught I've seen some very sketchy behavour and some VERY sketchy characters who I absolutely knew had ulterior motives for buying rounds of ice cream for the kids. Not foreigners. And I'm not going to get into it but there are some sexual tendencies in this culture that would make anyone from my country more than a little uncomfortable. SO it seems to me like some of the story is missing when I see the outrage at teachers who "touch students inappropriately". For God's sake because men are still dominant in this society through a system they call "hojeok", there is all kinds of inappropriate touching that goes on between female elders who are proud of young, male family members. And children are still spanked by teachers. This could very easily be done in sexually inappropriate ways. It makes me sick to talk about it.
But not as sick as the recent story about the 16-year-old girl who had been repeatedly raped, FOR 7 YEARS!, by three of her relatives. Two uncles and her grandfather. Do the math. They started when she was 9. So where is the moral outrage about THIS story? Has anybody outside Korea heard about it? Nope. Only through the blogs of us foreigners in Korea. And while there was a little bit of protest about it by Koreans, they quickly lost interest in it. The internet hits on the story dropped rapidly and died pretty fast.
These three guys went to trial and were found guilty of rape by Korean law. WHEW! Good! They'll certainly get what they deserve! Cuz this is an enlightened, civilized society and the laws are morally reasonable. RIGHT? These GUILTY men together served a grand total of zero days in jail! Nil. Nadda. Fuck all. And there's more. The victim was released back into their custody to be raped some more!!! There is even more. The girl was mentally disabled.
The inescapable conclusion, (and it's bolstered by other stories like U.S. soldiers abusing Korean women, so-called "comfort women" who were forced to have sex by Japanese during their occupation of Korea, and so on), the real outrage is not about the sex or the power dynamics, it's simply that Koreans don't like people sexually abusing Koreans - unless they are Korean.
I can't think of a clearer sign that Korea is a lost cause as far as globalization is concerned. But maybe I'm just cranky from not enough sleep. I don't know. Fuck. I work at a school where a majority of my students are young, pretty girls. I live in the same dorm as them. All any one of them has to do is say I was touching them incorrectly and who knows what might happen to me. Would my ten year career without any incidents be any defence? Doubt it. Would a parent or fellow student serve a day in jail for killing me? I doubt that too. But I'll tell you what, I personally know of a few incidents they've had with Korean teachers sexual misconduct here and not only were they not prosecuted, they were reinstated! Odds of that happening to me or any other foreigner under the same circumstances? Zero. Zip. Nadda. Fuck all.
Just feeling a little more vulnerable as a foreigner here in Korea. I had a picture of the new Korean 50,000 weon bill with an old Korean dude with his pants at his knees in the spot where national dignitaries usually appear. I thought it might be appropriate for this post. But for some reason I can't post pics or links here any more. Maybe I've been flagged by the Korean government already.
Back To School
A shudder literally went down my spine as I typed those three most dreaded words of my childhood. Old habits die hard I guess. Cues from childhood kick in. I still can't get used to the sound a wooden spoon makes either when someone twirls it in their hand. In my childhood that sound was almost invariably followed by a good, (and always well deserved), whack with said spoon. Mom always twirled before whacking. Like a batter's hitch. And if ever I see someone put a fork into their mouth upside-down then pull it out through closed lips, I sometimes flinch. That was the warm-up for a fork to the head in my house. So here's some parenting advice from father Dave: if you're gonna whack your kid with the kitchenware, don't hot dog it, just grip it and rip it. Your kids will thank you for easing future trauma.
Those were three of many very similar feelings I got during my childhood life which all contributed to a general sensation of flightlessness. I ached to get out into the real world and make my own rules. I had simple desires. I wanted to drink directly from the milk carton without looking both ways first. I wanted to walk around the house all day in my gotch. I wanted to watch exactly everything I wanted to watch on TV. I just wanted to do a whole bunch of those things that usually led to whacks with the kitchenware. It turned out I never really DID get free from school but two out of three ain't bad. I drink heartily from all my beverage containers. So here's some advice from host Dave: If you're at my house and I offer you a beverage, it's safer if it's from a previously unopened container. I'm in my underwear right now. More advice for visitors: knock or call before opening my door. And I just watched The Apprentice, Big Bang, Amazing Race, then because I fell asleep the first time, watched Amazing Race again. I'm airborne, man, I'm flying!
This is one of the aspects I kind of enjoy about working at a college here in Korea. I get to see kids with their first taste of freedom. For them it's nowhere near as total as mine was but it's still fun to watch. It might be interesting for people out there to read where I notice it the most. It's not in cooking or eating because every last students eats every last meal at a restaurant, at the cafeteria or they get it delivered. So not a whole lot of change there. You might think it's in the area of drinking. They certainly DO take advantage of not having to pass the soju breathalyzer when they get home late at night. Kids are getting drunk and getting busy here! But I don't think that's the biggest adjustment. Not the sex either. Or having to get their arses out of bed and into class without being forced by Mommy or Daddy.
I'd say the biggest transformation in these kids is in the area of fashion. This includes make-up, (boys and girls mind you!), hairstyles, and clothes. It is in keeping with the spirit of this country that kids spend way more time trying to LOOK like adults than ACT like adults when they get out on their own. It's a natural thing though in a country where most college aged kids still look like middle school children. And not in just MY opinion, they behave at a similar maturity level too. I think less than half of my male students shave. Some of the girls look like they haven't gotten used to puberty yet either. So I guess it's just natural to overcompensate. And the results are hilarious to me. It's all I can do to keep from laughing in the face of it as I walk amongst them.
In the mornings the boys all take their showers in the shower right across the hall from my room. And like clockwork as they enter the bathroom area they all give a high-pitched, phlegmless, amateurish hock that I suppose had been passed down from male to male in their respective families. And ostensibly to improve that very hock in the morning about 90% of them smoke. Even some of the girls have started that. Unfortunately sheer loudness of voice must also be regarded as a right of passage to adulthood here too because no matter what the time might be there's nobody talking quietly.
And just months ago these kids wore the same clothes 6 days a week. No make-up and no hairstyles to speak of. Now it's time to make up for all the school uniformity. It's a sight to see! Particularly the shoes. I saw no less than 4 students who almost took a bite out of the pavement today because they were wearing their new high heels. One girl fell down a few stairs but managed to right herself before disaster. And I purposely look sometimes - almost every girl is wearing high heels! I even saw a dude today who looked like he had blisters on his blisters wearing a brand new pair of shiny brown shoes that were thin and about 6 sizes too long.
The make-up on the girls is outlandish. I try not to get too close to my female students. It's good practice in case I teach back in Canada anyway. But it's like taking a rocketship to the moon. It looks like a smooth round circle from Earth but as you get closer you see cracks, scars, craters, and scarification in the crust. I had a few female students who tried coloured contacts. That's just spooky. Extended eyelashes that could take out an eye with black mascara snow chunks falling off now and then. It's not yet to the point of Japan but a LOT of kids get their hair coloured. I think I would do that. I mean EVERYBODY has the exact same hair all through school! Perfume is getting more popular. I don't NEED to get close to smell that.
And then there are the clothes! As different as a backpack is to a Gucci bag! We just got a new building over the winter vacation for the Hotel Management courses but I think the school could just as well have installed catwalks between the dorms and the buildings. That's what the roads here are. I could look out my window and be a fashion announcer at almost any time. Here now is Shin Ae sporting her splashy spring colours and saying, "GO AWAY WINTER! I'm in the mood for bikinis and beaches!" Shin Ae has a daringly cut McGuire hunting tartan minikilt with matching Chanel sporran. She has on a blindingly fuscia top and sensible black beret. She is walking Lassie her mini schnauzer. Shin Ae is a Capricorn and she enjoys bubble tea and paper folding. Whoops! Be careful with those 8 inch Italian heels, Shin Ae! Well at least she won't step on a hemline.
Next we have Yong Hwan. Doesn't he look businesslike in his, umm, pants and shirt. And old guy socks and shoes.
There's not much to men's fashion in Korea other than men don't wear t-shirts, running shoes or white socks after the age of 18. Except sometimes when they play sports offline. That's all I ever wear. But I can pull it off because I'm a foreigner.
Anyhoo, these are some things I noticed on my first day back today. Today I taught a class that I teach 3 times a week that only needs two lessons in my opinion and a class that I teach twice a week that could really use 3 lessons. But I'm still not sure if the second class was actually supposed to be mine. I might have walked in on a dozen students using an empty room to relax and taught them all about my hometown, hobbies and intruducing yourself to a stranger. It wouldn't be the first time. Nobody will say anything if you're teaching the wrong class. And they won't get up and leave either. I would't be surprised but I would be happy cuz they were pretty low level even for Seokang.
I asked the dean of the department what room I was expected to teach in and he showed me on the schedule I was in 103. But after teaching an hour my boss called and told me some students had been waiting for an hour in room 204. So I asked the people in my class how many students there were in their class. They told me 30. I had only 10 I think. So I assumed there were 20 people upstairs. I went up and there were two guys and they showed me on their class/book list that they were in a TOEFL class. I don't teach TOEFL. I hate it with a passion! But I'm still not sure where I was supposed to be or where all my students were. That's okay because there were a bunch of other people in the classroom as well and one was the dean. He had no clue what was what. And, bad news, there were some cleaning ladies and maintenence men. One was the tall Idon'tcaretaker! So damn, he didn't get the boot! He just got transfered to the new building. But I guess that's better than having him in the dorm.
But that's the way things usually are on the first day. Organized confusion. I'm sure by mid semester we'll have all the bumps ironed out. It's okay, they're all just here to try to convince the world that they're adults now anyway. They're so cute! Hee hee hee.
Those were three of many very similar feelings I got during my childhood life which all contributed to a general sensation of flightlessness. I ached to get out into the real world and make my own rules. I had simple desires. I wanted to drink directly from the milk carton without looking both ways first. I wanted to walk around the house all day in my gotch. I wanted to watch exactly everything I wanted to watch on TV. I just wanted to do a whole bunch of those things that usually led to whacks with the kitchenware. It turned out I never really DID get free from school but two out of three ain't bad. I drink heartily from all my beverage containers. So here's some advice from host Dave: If you're at my house and I offer you a beverage, it's safer if it's from a previously unopened container. I'm in my underwear right now. More advice for visitors: knock or call before opening my door. And I just watched The Apprentice, Big Bang, Amazing Race, then because I fell asleep the first time, watched Amazing Race again. I'm airborne, man, I'm flying!
This is one of the aspects I kind of enjoy about working at a college here in Korea. I get to see kids with their first taste of freedom. For them it's nowhere near as total as mine was but it's still fun to watch. It might be interesting for people out there to read where I notice it the most. It's not in cooking or eating because every last students eats every last meal at a restaurant, at the cafeteria or they get it delivered. So not a whole lot of change there. You might think it's in the area of drinking. They certainly DO take advantage of not having to pass the soju breathalyzer when they get home late at night. Kids are getting drunk and getting busy here! But I don't think that's the biggest adjustment. Not the sex either. Or having to get their arses out of bed and into class without being forced by Mommy or Daddy.
I'd say the biggest transformation in these kids is in the area of fashion. This includes make-up, (boys and girls mind you!), hairstyles, and clothes. It is in keeping with the spirit of this country that kids spend way more time trying to LOOK like adults than ACT like adults when they get out on their own. It's a natural thing though in a country where most college aged kids still look like middle school children. And not in just MY opinion, they behave at a similar maturity level too. I think less than half of my male students shave. Some of the girls look like they haven't gotten used to puberty yet either. So I guess it's just natural to overcompensate. And the results are hilarious to me. It's all I can do to keep from laughing in the face of it as I walk amongst them.
In the mornings the boys all take their showers in the shower right across the hall from my room. And like clockwork as they enter the bathroom area they all give a high-pitched, phlegmless, amateurish hock that I suppose had been passed down from male to male in their respective families. And ostensibly to improve that very hock in the morning about 90% of them smoke. Even some of the girls have started that. Unfortunately sheer loudness of voice must also be regarded as a right of passage to adulthood here too because no matter what the time might be there's nobody talking quietly.
And just months ago these kids wore the same clothes 6 days a week. No make-up and no hairstyles to speak of. Now it's time to make up for all the school uniformity. It's a sight to see! Particularly the shoes. I saw no less than 4 students who almost took a bite out of the pavement today because they were wearing their new high heels. One girl fell down a few stairs but managed to right herself before disaster. And I purposely look sometimes - almost every girl is wearing high heels! I even saw a dude today who looked like he had blisters on his blisters wearing a brand new pair of shiny brown shoes that were thin and about 6 sizes too long.
The make-up on the girls is outlandish. I try not to get too close to my female students. It's good practice in case I teach back in Canada anyway. But it's like taking a rocketship to the moon. It looks like a smooth round circle from Earth but as you get closer you see cracks, scars, craters, and scarification in the crust. I had a few female students who tried coloured contacts. That's just spooky. Extended eyelashes that could take out an eye with black mascara snow chunks falling off now and then. It's not yet to the point of Japan but a LOT of kids get their hair coloured. I think I would do that. I mean EVERYBODY has the exact same hair all through school! Perfume is getting more popular. I don't NEED to get close to smell that.
And then there are the clothes! As different as a backpack is to a Gucci bag! We just got a new building over the winter vacation for the Hotel Management courses but I think the school could just as well have installed catwalks between the dorms and the buildings. That's what the roads here are. I could look out my window and be a fashion announcer at almost any time. Here now is Shin Ae sporting her splashy spring colours and saying, "GO AWAY WINTER! I'm in the mood for bikinis and beaches!" Shin Ae has a daringly cut McGuire hunting tartan minikilt with matching Chanel sporran. She has on a blindingly fuscia top and sensible black beret. She is walking Lassie her mini schnauzer. Shin Ae is a Capricorn and she enjoys bubble tea and paper folding. Whoops! Be careful with those 8 inch Italian heels, Shin Ae! Well at least she won't step on a hemline.
Next we have Yong Hwan. Doesn't he look businesslike in his, umm, pants and shirt. And old guy socks and shoes.
There's not much to men's fashion in Korea other than men don't wear t-shirts, running shoes or white socks after the age of 18. Except sometimes when they play sports offline. That's all I ever wear. But I can pull it off because I'm a foreigner.
Anyhoo, these are some things I noticed on my first day back today. Today I taught a class that I teach 3 times a week that only needs two lessons in my opinion and a class that I teach twice a week that could really use 3 lessons. But I'm still not sure if the second class was actually supposed to be mine. I might have walked in on a dozen students using an empty room to relax and taught them all about my hometown, hobbies and intruducing yourself to a stranger. It wouldn't be the first time. Nobody will say anything if you're teaching the wrong class. And they won't get up and leave either. I would't be surprised but I would be happy cuz they were pretty low level even for Seokang.
I asked the dean of the department what room I was expected to teach in and he showed me on the schedule I was in 103. But after teaching an hour my boss called and told me some students had been waiting for an hour in room 204. So I asked the people in my class how many students there were in their class. They told me 30. I had only 10 I think. So I assumed there were 20 people upstairs. I went up and there were two guys and they showed me on their class/book list that they were in a TOEFL class. I don't teach TOEFL. I hate it with a passion! But I'm still not sure where I was supposed to be or where all my students were. That's okay because there were a bunch of other people in the classroom as well and one was the dean. He had no clue what was what. And, bad news, there were some cleaning ladies and maintenence men. One was the tall Idon'tcaretaker! So damn, he didn't get the boot! He just got transfered to the new building. But I guess that's better than having him in the dorm.
But that's the way things usually are on the first day. Organized confusion. I'm sure by mid semester we'll have all the bumps ironed out. It's okay, they're all just here to try to convince the world that they're adults now anyway. They're so cute! Hee hee hee.
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