World Jr. Hockey Championships - Team Canada Program

The wait to open up gifts is over! And for me the wait to start the World Jrs. is a day longer and it's over too! I'll be up at 5:30 eating Cheerios in my PJ's and watching team Canada start its way out of the Group of Death by beating the Russians. Team Canada is in with The Czech Republic, Sweden and Russia. One of these teams is done after round robin! I don't think it'll be the Swedes because they outplayed Canada in pre-tourny action. So I have to hope the Czechs and Russians didn't put together as strong a team as the Swedes. We'll see.

My pre-tournament guesses as far as line match-ups were, uh, not so good. But I put a lot of guys together based on what hand they shot and one of the huge trends in hockey nowadays: off-wing one-timer goals. I'll concede that Dave Cameron probably knows who plays well together a wee bit better than I do. So the lines we've seen are probably better than mine. And to show you how good DC is, he actually HAS paid attention to the off-wing one-timer trend and has been putting Ellis a right-handed shot on the left point, and Schwartz, a left-handed forward on the right point on the power play. And check the vid kids, it's already working. They both have one-timer goals and are getting good chances like that.

So the following are the revised lines player by player with their stats and performance rating by me.

Line 1

C Brayden Schenn- He Only has a goal and an assist so far. He didn't score in the first game against the Swiss either. But he was my pick for player of the game vs. the Swedes. He's making sweet moves close in and looking like the NHLer on the squad.

RW Jaden Schwartz- Got a goal in game one, 2 assists and lots of shots in game two and set up a goal in game three vs. the Fins. He'll get lots more to add to his 4 pre-tourney points if they keep him on the right point on the power play.

LW Louis Leblanc- Spectacular in game one! Got a goal and an assist. He set up Schenn's goal against Sweden but didn't get credit for an assist. He played a more defensive role in the second two games. I hope he gets back to offense against Russia.

Line 2

C Sean Couturier- Leads team Canada with 6 points, 4 of them in game one vs. Switzerland. He is MAGIC with Foligno although I've heard the same about Hamilton. Although the second line isn't the one I had picked, they have been the best.

RW Zack Kassian- He's not with the linemates I chose for him but he has been a bull in a China shop as expected. He got no points in game one but his linemates got 6 and he was a big part of that. In game two he drew a penalty barging to the net then scored on the ensuing power play. And in game three he got two assists and showed some good hands. He's already hitting everything that moves and scoring well. I still like this guy!

LW Marcus Foligno- I picked him as the first star of game one. He was a darkhorse to make team Canada but has done EVERYTHING for them so far. Got a goal and assist game one and put up a screen on another goal. He threw more hard hits than anyone in game two, got an assist and hit the post on an open net. Solid in game three as well although Cameron was experimenting with lines.

Line 3

C Ryan Johansen- I predicted he might center a line and he is doing so. Getting better every game too. He didn't score in game one but hit the post twice and got lots of power play time. Got a goal and an assist in game two and was the best player in game three in which he became the first Canuck to get his second and third goals AND he was a screen on the Ellis goal. However he had such a great game without Eakin and Connolly. This line is probably done for.

RW Cody Eakin- Hasn't been all that noticeable and probably should be the 13th forward for this team. Hasn't played bad at all though. Got an empty net goal in game 2 and an assist in game 1. I think he'll be used mostly for penalty killing and sparingly on offense.

LW Brett Connolly- Looked like the sniper he is in game one putting a lot of rubber on the net and hitting the post once but only got one assist. Also set up Barrie for a sure goal but he didn't score. Unfortunately he got sick and we saw less of him in game two and none of him in game three. Hope he's back for the opener vs. Russia.

Line 4?

C Cody Cizikas- Got a goal and an assist in the first game. He has looked good but not outstanding. I think coach Cameron will find him a spot on a line with Howden and Ashton for the tourney. And it will be line 4.

RW Quinton Howden- He has been a stand-out in every game. Got an assist in game one but sort of disappeared in favour of Hamilton in the third period. Some great penalty killing and 2 assists in game two. Then got third star of game three. He got an assist and a goal. Missed on the first but not the second. I think he's just getting stronger.

LW Carter Ashton- I think he's been playing mostly right wing but it doesn't matter much. He's a big, skilled player and versatile. Got a goal and assist in game one but hasn't scored since. I think when he gets some regular linemates and figures out their chemistry he'll be back. Till then he'll just keep throwing punishing body checks.

#13 Curtis Hamilton- Didn't notice him too much in game one; good penalty killing in game two; and he played very well in game three. Had one awesome rush to the net that got him an assist. I think he'll become a fixture on the third line and get lots of either Eakin's or Connolly's ice time.

The D

Ryan Ellis- An assist in game one, 2 key shot blocks and a post in game two and second star of game three with a goal and assist. He established himself on the left point of the p.p. getting some good one-timers and showing NHL composure. I predicted he was the likely choice for captain and DC agreed. He IS the man!

Jared Cowan- I think he's been the second best defenceman so far. His experience is showing.

Tyson Barrie- Got a goal and an assist in game one. He was good offensively but I don't think he gels with Ellis. I think Cameron has decided team Canada doesn't need his offense so much. He didn't score in games 2 or 3.

Dylan Olson- He's been very good.

Calvin De Haan- Also very good. Got a goal in his junior home rink in game one and played solidly in games two and three. Had some great power play chances but hasn't cashed in for a while.

Eric Gudbranson- Haven't noticed him and that means he's playing exactly the way he's supposed to.

Simon Despres- You may never notice this player in this world championships unless there's an injury. Riding the pine a lot so far.

Well time to hit the hay. I'm setting the old alarm clock for 3 AM so I can watch the football but I'll be switching over to hockey at 5:30 AM. I'm so glad I am not working right now!!!

Pension/Severance Fiasco

Part one: The Deception

Since I haven't been doing much here in Korea over the last 3 or 4 months I thought it might be fun to try to get severance pay from Seokang College. If you have read this blog you know that after my first year there they didn't pay, and I didn't ask for, severance pay because I was treated well. But over the past two years the jagoffs in charge of the language program at Seokang, Jung and Peter have lied to me; asked me to commit fraud every semester at grade submission time; locked me out of my home on numerous occasions; refused to provide a better apartment for me even though I found one that would actually save the college money over keeping me in the dorms; threw away my mail or just kept it for several months before giving it to me and refused to implement a simpler mail plan I had provided that would solve the problem; invented reasons to refuse permission for me to teach camps; scheduled exam conflicts in almost every class every exam period for me; broke their promise of keeping class sizes below 30 and now have classes of over 70; said, "Impossible!" when I asked to split a big class in half and even offered to teach the resulting new class for FREE; refused a camp that I proposed which would make the college MASSIVE piles of cash even though I took care of everything in the camp except the facilities, (which would have been Seokang College); tried to sabotage my hiring by giving me a contract with the wrong date; broke all the contracts they made with me; and I'm sure I'm forgetting lots of specific incidents. Suffice to say they have cherished their hatred of me and bent over backwards to make things as difficult for me as possible, sometimes even at their own expense!

Why? Because I'm too honest. That's what it boils down to. To give you an example, my second contract included a starting date of Sept. 1st. Jung was given my schedule from the school where I was working at the time and I told him I would only have the last week of August to move and do all the immigration nonsense. He said at the interview, "I hate your schedule," but never once mentioned that I had to start work at Seokang the last week of August when I had just told him I had planned to move. The result was that I was informed at the last minute and had to quit with no notice, pay another teacher to cover my Mokpo classes, pay expensive weekend rates for moving, run around Korea getting things stamped and sealed and verified and was miraculously able to make it to work at Seokang on time.

Did Jung say, "Thank you?" Nope. Did he offer to help with the extra expenses HE was responsible for? Nope. He just whined like a little girl about losing face when I pointed out that it was his negligence that had led to all my unnecessary expense and misery. And hated me more. During the immigration process I told him we needed to get everything done RIGHT NOW. He called immigration and they told him it was, "Impossible." I told him we were in a rush and that we would have to go down there and get things rolling and not accept the old Korean favourite, "Impossible." as an answer. While he whined about how he had other things to do and I never ONCE pointed out that if he hadn't given me a contract with the wrong date on it, we wouldn't be so rushed, we went to immigration and guess what? POSSIBLE! We got everything done. But this only made him hate me worse because AGAIN I had cost him face by showing him that I knew more about immigration, (i.e. HIS job), than he did.

Noticing a pattern? I was hated for helping. The whole time there I was trying to solve problems at Seokang and make things work better and it just made the people in charge hate me. The extent of their hatred I still don't know but it is becoming clearer and clearer as the pursuit of my severance pay continues.

A while ago I read something online, possibly at efllaw.com, that said that according to the Labor Standards Act of Korea any business that employs 5 or more people must pay severance in an amount of no less than a month's wages for every 12 months worked. I didn't read about any exceptions. In fact, I remember being paid pension AND severance pay at Chonnam U. and Hankuk University of Foreign Studies. I THINK that if I had worked a full year at Mokpo U. I would have received both as well. The private institutes I had worked for paid both too except for my first "hagwon" which told me at the end of my contract, "Sorry, sorry. No severance. IMF crisis. But please re-sign. BIG bonus! David good teacher!" It occurred to me that Seokang, a place where they regularly commit academic fraud and seem to regard labour laws like most Koreans see traffic laws: as just suggestions, might just be withholding my severance pay illegally. I figured that forcing them to obey the laws might be a perfect way to get some semblance of satisfaction, and, yes, revenge for the crap they had put me through for being honest and law-abiding.

So I went to the labor office in late August just before my contract with Seokang ended. I had been on vacation since mid June so my work was finished, just not the contract period. I went to the labor office to investigate the chances of getting severance pay. I went with my friend Guns, a Korean, as my translator. We met with an old, thin guy who told us that I was indeed entitled to severance pay from Seokang College. That was great news! I heard Guns talking and I heard the man speaking as he called Peter on the phone and "yeon geum" was never mentioned, only "dwei jigeum." Yeon geum is pension and dwei jigeum is severance. The result of the phone call was Penis lying to the guy and saying that Seokang had every intention of paying severance pay when our contract period was over. I told the guy that they hadn't paid me severance for my first year, or my second year and nobody who had worked there during my 3 years of service had ever received it. He said we'd have to wait until the contract lapsed.

Part two: The Wait

Through September, October and November I wrote emails, called, texted and talked in person with Penis about my severance pay and he always faked like he didn't know what it was. I even used the word "dwei jigeum" to him. He just ignored every attempt. So I returned to the labor office a couple weeks ago in early Dec. The old, thin guy was there but he was busy with other people. A girl named Shin Hye Jin asked me to have a seat somewhere and when I communicated in English that I was waiting for the old guy she went over to him and said something in Korean after which he looked at me and gave a head-shaking hand wave. It was either that he didn't remember me or that he didn't want to be bothered with me. At any rate the girl took down my information and made ANOTHER call to Penis. I was with my friend Amber who works at Gwangju U. and she had one of the workers there write on a piece of paper in Korean that I was after my severance pay. I saw it in black and white, "dwei jigeum." When she saw this, Shin Hye Jin said I was entitled to dwei jigeum, took down some particulars and called Penis. Peter had the gaul to ask the chick to hand me the phone. I get on and he says, "What's up?" I said he knew what was up because I had told him a million times in every messaging media except post. He said exactly this: "David, you should know that Seokang College doesn't pay severance pay." I said that I knew but I was pretty sure they had to according to the law. He hung up on me.

The girl did her best with her limited English and said a meeting would be set up and that I would be mailed a notice with the date and time of the meeting on it. Then I would have to come back to Gwangju again. But because of the language barrier I was a bit confused about what, if anything, had been accomplished at that meeting. I was told by both the old, thin guy and the girl that I was entitled to my severance. I didn't understand why there was a need for a meeting and why at the labor office, they couldn't just look up the labor laws and make a ruling on the case then and there. So I contacted the Gwangju International Center where they help foreigners with problems they sometimes have in Korea. A very nice gal named Karina Prananto helped me out by calling the girl who had dealt with me at the labor office. Then I received an email, from the GIC, NOT the Labor Office, at 10 PM Monday Dec. 20th that I was supposed to meet Penis and a labor mediator, arbitrator or judge or whatever on Dec. 21st at 10 AM. Obviously, since it takes me 5 hours to get to the labor office by train and/or bus I could not make it. I got pretty frustrated and went out for a few scotches that night wondering if I'd be told I had forfeited my severance pay. I was also very suspicious about why the mail notice was not sent and how the impossible meeting ended up being scheduled.

Next day I received a call from Penis who was at the labor office with the labor mediator named Park Sung Yoon. He sounded giddy when he told me that if I didn't make it to the appointment I wouldn't receive my severance pay. Interestingly I could hear Park Sung Yoon in the background talking to Peter almost as if he was telling him to ask me if my fridge was running or if I had 10 pound balls. At one point Penis even handed him the phone and he spoke to me in really fast Korean knowing full well I can't speak Korean.

As luck would have it, my buddy Guns had called just a bit before 10 that morning saying that he was driving to Gwangju and asking if I still needed help with the severance pay issue. I told him about the scheduling fiasco and gave him Shin Hye Jin's number. While Park Sung Yoon to bombarding me with Korean I managed to say to him, in Korean, that my Korean friend is calling Shin Hye Jin right now. He then handed the phone back to Penis. He had no more taunting to do so he hung up. Guns called moments later saying that we had a new appointment the next day at 5 PM. So Guns came over and we drove to the Ju together.

Even though I was not feeling 100% because of the scotches the night before, it was good to see Guns. I felt kind of bad for dragging him into the mess and told him I appreciated his help. We had some sam gyup sal with a couple of Guns' friends, hit a few baseballs then I went to Gwangju U. and visited with Amber and Maria and stayed for free in Bill's dorm room. I paid for Guns' gas and the sam gyup sal. It was the least I could do.

The next morning I went with Guns to my bank and got my transaction history printed out so that I could show the mediator all the deposits Seokang College had made to my account. I got the ENTIRE history of my bank acct. EVERY transaction. It was a misunderstanding but that turned out to be good. The teller also printed out just the Seokang deposits. It cost me 1000 won.

Part three: The First Judgement

Guns and I got to the labor office early and since Guns had his I phone and computer he killed time by finding out more info. He called ANOTHER place that said I was entitled to severance pay. We were both pretty sure the meeting was just gonna be a formality. At 4:45 we got to the office where Park Sung Yoon's desk is and we reported to him. He told us to wait in the waiting room. Then a few minutes later I got a call from him saying, "Deureoyo." I'm not sure of the spelling but this means come in. If you can find 5 people above the age of 5 in Korea who can't say, "Come in." in English I'll eat my dirty underwear. Throughout the entire meeting Park Sung Yoon rarely spoke to me directly but when he did it was like he was assaulting me with Korean. It was pretty clear to me that his behaviour and in all likelihood the unreasonable rescheduling of the meeting were both Peter's influence.

The meeting started out with Peter trying to explain that Seokang had paid my pesion and acting as if he didn't know the difference between pension and severance. In fact he produced a document that said just that. I told Guns to tell the mediator that Peter was acting right now and that he is very aware of the difference. I'm not sure how exactly Guns was translating but for the better part of an HOUR we were farting around with semantics. Severance is paid by the employer at the end of the work relationship, or when it is "severed." Pension is money for old age that I contribute to and it's paid pursuant to an agreement between the Canadian govt and the Korean govt. There are two different words in Korean. Why do you suppose that is if they are the same. I showed in my bank records where Seokang had paid pension and it said, "Yeon geum" on the bank printout. It was about that point when the mediator made his final ruling. He sided with Peter.

I then told Guns to tell him that there are lots of schools around Korea that pay both severance and pension. In fact I had worked for some. He said, "Prove it." So I showed the deposits made to my account by H.U.F.S. The severance payment was there and the pension went to my Canadian account when I left the country. He started to change his mind a little bit thinking that I wasn't just taking a piss here. He also started making documents that he hadn't prepared until after his initial "judgement." I think he wanted to make sure he did this thing correctly just to cover his ass if I was right.

At this point he said that I had to contact my former employers and obtain written proof of them paying me both severance and pension. I said to him that what those schools paid me had no bearing on the case, what HE needed to do was make a judgement from a position of certainty. I asked Guns to ask him, "If I get these written statements from the other schools, what will you do then?" I asked that same question at least 3 times. Again I am not sure but I think Guns was translating correctly. I never received an answer. I told Guns to tell him, that the onus is not on me to prove anything. It was up to HIM to make a fair judgement and I repeated that it had to be from a position of certainty. The only certainty is the law in the case. We were at the labor office. Surely there must have been some access to labor laws there! I told Guns to ask him, (like 4 times), "Are you saying that Seokang College is a private school and therefore can pay pension in lieu of severance?" AGAIN I never got an answer. It must have been this fucking face nonsense again because I was essentially telling a guy who didn't know his job how to do it. I actually said a few times that I could not believe that he didn't actually KNOW the laws regarding severance pay and the difference between it and pension. Whether Guns translated accurately or not, I know the guy understood that and got defensive. He told Guns to tell me that I was the very first person who had ever come into the Gwangju Labor Office with this problem.

HEY me and Guns are Pioneers! Anyway, in the end he took back his hasty "judgement" and decided to give both Peter and me some tasks. Peter had to find the difference between severance and pension, (remember he told me Seokang doesn't pay severance and he KNOWS they pay pension so he is well aware of the difference), and he wants me to get proof I was paid both pension and severance from some other employers. Then he wants us to return AGAIN on Dec. 28th. We had been at this an hour and 45 minutes and it was pretty clear to me that this guy had no intention of doing what it was his job to do: look up the labor law that applied to our situation and make a ruling according to it. I have no reason to believe he will do that when, or rather IF I return on Dec. 28th. But he drew up some official LOOKING papers that I had to sign and fingerprint in about 8 places to make it LOOK like he had done his job.

I left the office thinking that if I could get a labor lawyer or a representative from the labor standards office or somebody like that to scare this dude a little, maybe he might look up that laws and make a ruling. I still admitted to Guns that I had thought that all these people were positive that I had severance pay coming to me but maybe THEY were confusing pension and severance too. I mean the old, thin guy, Shin Hye Jin and whoever Guns called. Maybe the laws, (which I read on EFLlaw.com are written by former politicians, lawyers and lawmakers who become heads of schools, and they are written purposefully vaguely in order that they may be used for their school's purposes.), DO say that Seokang is able to pay me pension instead of severance! Well I did some searching, again online so I don't know if it's accurate or up-to-date but I have found that in the Labor Standards Act of Korea in section 34 SUBSECTION 4 it appears to say almost exactly that! And there's ANOTHER piece of legislation called the Pension for Private Teachers and Staff Act which allows private universities and colleges to put retirement pension statements in their contracts instead of severance pay.

If this is the law of Korea that we are currently operating under, and it wasn't just thrown up there by one of the private colleges and universities who want to exempt themselves from paying severance, then I don't think I'm gonna get any severance pay. But this begs the question, how is it possible that I was informed by two labor office representatives that I was entitled to severance pay and a third made a ruling that I WASN'T entitled to it before he had any idea what the hell it was?!?! And why oh why doesn't anybody at the labor office know this law? Even after I said this almost verbatim and asked if a law like this existed! 3 or 4 times!!! One of the laws in the Labor Standards Act of Korea states that any workplace with 5 or more employees, like the Labor Office, MUST have a copy of the Labor Standards Act readily accessable. There are actual penalties including jail time if they don't. I seriously doubt I'd be able to find a copy at the Gwangju Labor Office. It looks to me like just another professional LOOKING office in a professional LOOKING building where the peope do little more than nothing but do it busily enough to appear industrious. That's MY judgement.

The aftermath

And then they have the unmitigated gaul to look down their noses at a guy like me and call me "lazy!" I'm not lazy I'm just a helluva lot more efficient than you, you asshole and that frees up a lot of spare time for me to get some well-earned relaxation.

I'm talking to Penis and Park Sung Yoon. You see, after the meeting was over, I got some interesting information from Guns about what was happening in Korean. First of all I am pretty sure the meeting was pushed ahead in order that I might not have the time to find a translator and so that Penis would be able to MIStranslate everything I said to the arbitrator. And the arbitrator was undoubtedly aware of all of this. I have a strong suspicion that he was paid too. Guns said there were several instances when Penis TRIED to translate what I had just said INcorrectly and Guns had to straighten him out.

There was also a little chatting and a little laughing between Guns and Peter. I found out from Guns that Penis was trying to do to him what he had obviously done to the arbitrator. He was schmoozing Guns saying that he shouldn't be friends with me. Saying I was good in my first year at Seokang but not the last two. AND calling me lazy because I haven't learned how to speak Korean. He was insinuating through slick sophistry that Guns was a bit of a sell-out and a traitor to Korea for helping a foreigner I have no doubt. The arbitrator did nothing to keep the atmosphere at the meeting professional. In fact his refusal to practice the common courtesy of speaking English to me in situations when he could easily have done so, made his position obvious. This racism, (I'm not gonna sugarcoat it and call it xenophobia because Penis is not afraid of me he hates me), was at the heart of every instance of Peter and Jung trying to make my life difficult at Seokang. This was why even after I threw them the olive branch of the camp that would have made them both a ton of money while I did all the work, they cherished that racist hatred of me so much that they ignored the offer. But not before trying to get from me the numbers and names of the contacts I had in Naju that were in charge of the camp and wanted me to make it happen. They wanted to steal it for themselves the bastards.

There is no doubt in my mind that when Seokang College is contacted by future prospective employers Peter will spin his yarns about what a terrible teacher and person I am. There is no chance I will get a good recommendation from them despite the 3 years of excellent teaching there and everything I did to make the place better. I have to wipe 3 years off my resume now and ensure that at every interview I will be asked about that and my answer will be scrupulously and skeptically received. I have little doubt that although I have applied at quite a few places, the fact that as yet I have had only one interview has a lot to do with Penis and/or Jung. And the length of time spent on my relationship with Seokang College at my interview for Jeonju U. leads me to believe that it was Peter's handiwork.

But I'm actually okay with the whole thing. It is giving me confirmation that I need to go in a different direction. I have given the university thing far too much time to work out and I have received no indication that it ever will. I have a pretty good job opportunity in a different area.

But that is for another entry. I will conclude by saying that I'm not going to do the bogus search for records from any of my past schools and I'm not going to that bogus meeting scheduled for Dec. 28th. The fact that Penis will have to make time for it makes me a little happy. I hope he has to miss something important. I really don't think it is fair to ask Guns to go back to that place either. So what I guess I might do is send the appropriate laws to Park Sung Yoon IN FUCKING ENGLISH, and ask him why he doesn't know them and why he was messing around when the whole mess could so easily have been solved. But there's no reason for me to think I will get any reply to that question or that anybody will learn anything at the Gwangju Labor Office from this. But they'll all be glad that the possibility of actually having to maybe DO something, embodied in me, will be out of their lives. Maybe I'll write something up about this and put it in the Gwangju News. I dunno.

World Jr. Hockey Championships

It's the most wonderful time of the yeeeeeear! Before the advent of NHL Gamecenter Live, which I've had the past couple years, the best hockey I had to look forward to over here in Korea was the annual TSN.ca televising of the World Jr. Hockey Championships. I love watching this tourney as much as American basketball fans love their March Madness and for a lot of the same reasons. These are young, hungry kids playing their hearts out to win for their team and country more than impress scouts. Not yet rich, spoiled businessmen playing to maintain their financial status without risking it through injury.

Last year the Canadian team came within a goal of the gold medal. It was the first time in quite a while anyone has taken it from Canada. But full marks for the US team. They were good. Aparently they are gonna be good THIS year again too and their playing in their own country. So team Canada is set up to do exactly what they had done to them last year. There are 4 guys on the team who settled for silver last year and they'll no doubt be telling the others how nice it was to get those medals. ANNNHHH! They'll be stomping on them, throwing them at walls, and grinding them down in the skate sharpener to ensure the boys know that nothing but gold is good enough.

The final rosters have been entered and the pre-tournament games begin on December 20th. I'm not sure if those will be aired on TSN.ca or not but I'm pretty sure I'll be watching livecasts of games provided by TSN.ca even if I'm teaching at a camp and have to be up at 3 AM to do so. Here's the sched: http://www.tsn.ca/world_jrs/feature/?id=4124

Nice thing is they keep them archived for NON-live viewing. The problem is accessing them without accidentally seeing the score. It's better just to watch them live. Hope you'll all be watching with me.

Here is a brief rundown of some of the players to watch. I don't know much about them but I'm crunching stats and a-googling. Here's what I've come up with.

Line 1?

Brayden Schenn is probably the class of the forwards on the team. A strapping farm boy from Saskatoon, he's already playing Center in the NHL for the LA Kings this year. He's got 2 assists in 8 games but is being used very sparingly. He scored 99 pts. in 59 games for the Brandon Wheat Kings last year so he got game. Some think he'll be the leading scorer for team Canada. I'm not so sure.

Jaden Schwartz is another Saskatchewan product. Though he is also a center he'll likely be on the wing with Schenn setting him up. He's a Colorado college boy right now but taking a break from the books to get some business done. He's got 26 pts. in 17 games with Colorado College this season.

Louis Leblanc is, (as the name would indicate), a Quebec Major Jr. Hockey League player for the Montreal Juniors. He's got 29 pts. in 24 games so far this season. Both Leblanc and Schwartz are a bit small, and they're both centers but since Leblanc shoots right and Schwartz shoots left they'll probably play right and left wing respectively. My UNtraditional wisdom says that should be reversed to get them some SWEET one-timers, but nobody ever listens to me.

Line 2

I think line two will be FAR more productive for team Canada.

Brett Connolly is a right handed sniper from Campbell River, BC who has 22 goals in 30 games for the PG Cougars in the WHL this season. He's a lanky 6'2 181 but he'll have some protection to his right that will allow him to freewheel. He'll center the best line of the tourney if it's put together.

Zack Kassian could be the guy folks. His 20-game suspensions and bar fights have taken a lot of attention away from the fact that this guy is a HUGE 6'3 226 bull-in-a-China-shop right winger who could run roughshod over this tourney. He'll barge into the opponent's zone, get the puck and set up one of his two sniping linemates a LOT if things are as they should be. He's got 48 pts. and 33 assists for the Windsor Spitfires this season. I sure hope this line is together!

Quinton Howden is an Oak Bank, Manitoba boy who ALSO has 22 goals this season. He plays for the Moosejaw Warriors in the WHL and got his 22 goals in only 29 games. He's a smooth skating left winger who will be the perfect complement to Kassian and Connolly.

Line 3

Sean Couturier He has the same initials as Sidney Crosby and is being compared to him all the time. Of course it's way too early but he IS someone who has a lot of eyes on him. This might be a detriment. He'll still get his share of points but the fact that he'll be targetted and the first line will get a lot of focus is just going to make line two better. He's from Bathurst, NB and has 51 pts. and 35 assists for Drummondville in the QMJHL this season. He has 3 more points than Kassian after having played 7 more games in a league where I think it's a little bit easier to score. But SHHHH, don't tell the other teams in the tourney.

Cody Eakin from Winterpeg, Manitoba is a character player. I think his nickname should be "Seth" because he looks like Seth Green. He's a natural center but has played on the wing. Good at forechecking and penalty killing he may be used in these roles. But he also has good hockey sense and rarely makes a bad pass. He has 18 goals and 39 pts. this season for the Swiftcurrent Broncos in the WHL.

Marcus Foligno seems to be a wildcard. He hasn't played in all the under 18, world jrs., world championships, etc. that everyone else on the team has played in. He has just gotten better at a staggeringly fast rate. At 6'2 200 lbs. he's a powerful left winger and he likes to get his nose dirty. Nobody will mess with Couturier or they'll go toe to toe with Marcus. But he's got 15 goals in 28 games with the Sudbury Wolves! He's no slouch. The 48 penalty minutes may be what got him on this team though. I am anxious to see this guy play.

The fourth line

Casey Cizikas is better known for his rugby play than hockey. Let's hope THAT changes this year. He aparently pile-drove a guy who was headlocking him in the midst of a rugby game. The guy already HAD head injuries and was medically ordered not to play but he died from head injuries and Casey was charged for manslaughter. Okay enough of that, I want to see him slaughter a few men as a member of what will probably be a hard-hitting 4th line for Canada. I think if this line is together and positioned properly they could do some scoring too. He's got 36 pts in 28 games with the Mississauga Majors in the OHL this season.

Carter Ashton is yet another Saskatchewan hockey playing lad who is a left-shooting right winger. I LOVE this idea because of the one-timer goals that leads to. He's also a big 6'3 219 grinder for the Regina Pats in the WHL who has 44 penalty minutes already. Hopefully he accumulates penalties wisely.

Ryan Johansen is a right shooting center who I think should be put on the left side of this line. I remember watching olympic and world jr. hockey last year and seeing a couple huge trends. One was the ease with which off-handed wingers were piling up the one-timer goals. I felt Canada, (as usual the more traditional thinking team), was probably taking the LEAST advantage of this tactic and could have made things easier for themselves if they had. Will they try it this year. I doubt it. But Johansen has 36 pts. in 31 games with the Portland Winterhawks in the WHL this season. He might center a line but I like him here.

That's it for the forwards. The defence I will just sum up. Jared Cowan is back. I loved his big hits at last year's World Jrs. and am looking forward to the same this year along with his stifling defence.

Ryan Ellis is the all time leading scorer amongst Canadian defencemen in the tourney. And he's back to extend his record. He's a tiny 5'10 154 but he'll be buzzing around and scoring more than most forwards. He's already got 40 pts. in 27 games as a defenceman with the Windsor Spitfires of the OHL. I think he'll be my favourite guy on the team. I can't wait to see how he does in the NHL!

Calvin de Haan returns this year to avenge his silver medal from 2010. He's steady and will have the confidence of being in his second WJHC.

Simon Despres is 6'4 222 but he's supposed to be a guy who can also score. He's a smooth skater and good shot blocker. He plays in the QMJHL where, as I said, I believe it's a bit easier to score, and I've heard has been kinda disappointing so far in training. We'll see...

Tyson Barrie is an offensive-minded defenceman. He plays for the Kelowna Rockets of the WHL and has 25 pts. in 23 games this season. He's a mainstay on their powerplay. Could be a good pairing with Ellis for power play situations.

Dylan Olsen is the only Alberta boy on the team. He's 6'2 222 and has 9 assists in 12 games for the NCAA college Duluth team this year. I imagine he'll be a stay-at-homer.

Erik Gudbranson was the captain of the Canadian under 18 team that included some of these same players. He's a rock solid 6'4 211 and the Kingston Frontenacs of the OHL will tell you he doesn't let many guys past him. He's a very physical player in his own end. But he also has a great outlet pass and hard shot from the point. Leadership is strong and I wouldn't be surprised to see him as the captain though Ryan Ellis might be the more likely choice.

So watch out for Canada this year! They're predicted to be not so much a one-line team and I think that will be good for them. It will spread the other teams thinner so we can take advantage of our depth. Usually that's Canada's biggest strength.

GO CANADA GO!

Full on or casual?

Full on or casual? It's a question isn't it? So was that. But really in so many ways we think full on is just going to be better and I am certainly starting to see a lot of examples where it isn't. Casual is always easier and sometimes it's just better, despite what we may be trained to believe. Of course examples will have to follow. And they will:

Parenting. GREAT example! Nowadays parents are full on protectors, instructors, disinfectors, nurturers and projectors. But kids aren't any better for it. Might be worse. Then you look at some of the sadsack, lazyass parenting of the past THAT WORKED and we gotta give this one to the casual. Kids can do stuff on their own. They can! And it's actually GOOD for them!

Education. Same thing in a lot of ways. Here in Asia where they spend twice the time in the classrooms as we, in so many very important ways, they're only half as smart. The only Koreans I've known who have managed to achieve a level of English I would consider to be totally fluent didn't get it the Korean way. They got it hangin' out with, dating and partying with English speakers. I always try to keep my classroom casual and administrators, (and lots of students), think I'm just lazy. And they are amazed how well they are able to convey that to me using the English they learned in my class playing games and doing fun exercises.

Religion. I don't want to pick on one so I'll be very vague here. But the full on militant religious are probably the same in all religions. They look at individuals very closely to see past the good, pick out all the details in the doctrine that differ so that they can pinpoint the sinners' exact routes to hell, (or its equivalent), talk with like-minded believers about how glad they are that Jesus, (or his equivalent), has delivered them from such evil ways, (as far as those like-minded believers know), then do a little self-congratulatory back slapping as humbly as possible, and finally pray for their lost souls. This takes a tremendous amount of study and effort! I prefer the Dalai Lama's casual approach. He believes we should just seek happiness. It's what we do anyway, right? But he cautions that improving your station in life, your means, your financial position, that's nice because it makes life easier but it differs from true happiness because it's not spiritual. Spiritual happiness comes from making others happy. If you want to make someone happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. Just be nice to people! Casual and effective. That's the way for me! What the world needs now, is love sweet love. It's the only thing that there's just too little of. What the world... and so on.

I was in Pyeong Taek today shopping at E-Mart. If you know Korea you know a lot of E-Marts have Mcdonalds and the one in Pyeongtaek does. And if you know Korea you know we haven't had 1/4 pounders at Mcdonalds. Until NOW! Just recently. So to tell you the truth it wasn't absolutely essential for me to go to E-Mart, I think about 1/4 of the reason I went was to eat Mclunch. And it was worth it!

But a funny thing happened at the Mclunch counter today. Not new, but funny. I ordered a 1/4 pounder set with 6 Mcnuggets. The cashier says no problem, rings me up and takes my money. Tells me about the 4-minute wait but doesn't mention there is no sweet and sour sauce in the place. I see her huck a little container of barbecue sauce on my tray. Now this is not a big thing but I can't tell you how many times this EXACT same thing has happened to me in Korea. Well occasionally it varies in the flavour of the sauce. But that's all. I always just ate my nuggets with mustard, barbecue sauce and even a few times with that awful chilli sauce for dipping the Mcwings. Ew. But I WANT sweet n sour! That's all. And why don't they TELL me? Easy, because they know the order was made, the nuggets might be in the oil already, a nice person will just take what he's given. Today I said DAMN THAT!

So I asked if there wasn't any sweet n sour sauce. She made a show of looking to make me think she hadn't been trained to hide that fact from me, then said no. So I said, "Okay forget the nuggets. Change them for a Big Mac." She yells something to the cook who yells something back to her. Then she says, "No." I just laughed. So did the Korean guy behind me. "NO?" And I laughed a bit more. So I downshift into English and say politely, "I don't want the nuggets if I have to eat them with barbecue sauce." She relents and tells the cook to fire up a Big Mac for me. Then asks me for the extra 900 won. I checked my burgers for spit and didn't find any.

Why this story? It just gets me thinking about Korea. Maybe thinking too much. You be the judge. But if I were working at a bulgogi restaurant and that chick walked in and ordered bulgogi I would TELL her if I had no bulgogi sauce, only barbecue. I wouldn't give her pork covered in barbecue sauce. She'd freak! Probably torch the restaurant, start a candlelight vigil, I'd be deported and soon the government would hastily enact a law that forbids all foreigners from serving meat with barbecue sauce on it in Korea. Okay maybe a little too much.

"We do it all for you." "Have it your way." "The customer is always right." Those probably don't even translate into Korean. The fact is, if they ran Mcdonalds in Korea the right way it'd be fast food not medium speed food. It was 1:00. Lunch time. There should have been a few Big Macs and at least one box of nuggets in the tanning bed so there would have been no problem. The problem originated in the kitchen. The cook had already started cooking the nuggets and didn't want to waste them. I remember going to Mcdonalds where they had egg timers on the counter. Two minutes. If your order took longer you got some sort of deal. 4-minute waits just shouldn't happen. And furthermore, had I stuck with the nuggets I would have been given my fries. Then 2 minutes later my burger. Then after the 4-minute wait, the nuggets. I don't want to eat in installments! But that's how they do it in Korea. They think it's better. Because it's their idea.

I'm getting to the point. If you go to the bank and open an account they give you a bankbook much like if you order fries at Mcdonalds they give you a packet of ketchup. The bankbook is optional. You can use it if you want. Same as the ketchup. But then suddenly on a Friday night when you are far from home you go to a bank machine to take out some cash to pay for the train home and your card is refused. You try 10 other machines and get the same result. You have to go the entire weekend without money. Plans are cancelled and people are disappointed. You go to your bank on Monday and they tell you the bank book MUST be regularly updated. If not your account is closed without notice or explanation. Of course you ask why and you get the robotic, "It's a rule." or "It's our policy." So you start up a new account, get a new bankbook, tear it up and throw it in the garbage in full view of the shocked bank teller who learns exactly nothing from the display. Never once does the thought cross the wide open transom of her mind, "Yeah, why DO we have that stupid rule?"

There IS a point coming. Trust me here. The bank teller and the Mcdonalds worker both have similar experiences with many other foreigners and develop a distaste for them. So they get jobs at the immigration office. There they are trained to ask for every piece of documentation the foreigner can possibly be required to produce. Whether or not it is necessary is not for the trainee to decide. They even tell people that they must leave the country while their work visas are negotiated even though that's not true. They have full information on their screens saying that the foreigner's degree has been verified three times but they make him do it again at his expense. They refuse provincial criminal record checks that are all just federal record checks requested by municipal police stations. They make the foreigner get the identical federal criminal record check directly from the federal police. At his expense. Plus they require sealed transcripts from the university as proof of attendance despite the fact that on the screen the verification of his documentation is crystal clear. They do this for a while and grow tired of being yelled at by irate foreigners even though it was fun at first. They now hate foreigners so they get jobs at airport immigration and customs.

There they tell folks that they need to surrender their alien cards and assure them there will be no troubles when they return to Korea on a visitor's visa. They know the stupid foreigner won't even be allowed onto the plane to Korea without a ticket OUT of Korea in his possession. And there are hastily enacted rules almost every day to decrease the number of things you can do without an alien card. They confiscate cigars and bottles of scotch to enjoy on the weekend. They get yelled at some more by foreigners and despise them.

They get married to a full-blooded Korean man, squeeze out 2.5 kids while falling out of love, obssess over the kids to make themselves forget about their husbands fillandering, and train their kids to do exactly the same things that have made their lives so "happy."

And now, finally the point. One of my favourite Rush songs is Subdivisions. In it there are some awesome lines that always make me think of Korea. "Growing up it all seemed so one-sided, Opinions all provided, The future pre-decided, Detached and subdivided, In the mass production zone, Nowhere is the dreamer or the misfit so alone. Korea is a mass production zone. People are trained, not educated. They are like this because Korea is as full on a capitalist society as can be. People are numbered consumers. They matter little in the grand scheme of Korea.

So the final addition to my list of things that are better casual than full on would be capitalism. Or I suppose any government. If Korea could loosen up a bit I bet they would blow right by Japan and maybe even China. But I fear I'll never be proven right.

I poured my ice into the ice-hole, deposited all the paper products into the trash and even tamped it down a bit. There was a tray on top with a big pile of ketchup on it. I lifted that tray and put mine underneath it in the stack. The girl from the counter came over, smiled and wished me well in the Korean way, (peace be with you). I said the same to her and smiled nicely. My smile was genuine though I'm not sure about hers.

I'm pretty sure I'll just take whatever sauce I'm offered next time.

Another Dave's Top 10 list: Top 10 Things That Bug Me About Survivor

I LOVE Survivor. It is one of my favourite shows of all time. If it were only animated! Dang! But seriously, it is not animated because it features real life. I know reality TV is to reality what Life cereal is to life but I like watching these folks who are usually "even better than the real thing", and in situations that are anything BUT normal because in every season there is a lot of real life. The show's creator, Mark Burnett prefers to think of it as "unscripted drama." It's not what these people would normally do since they are watched by millions. I'm sure there would be more fighting, swearing, and getting it on if they weren't. Probably even MORE lying, cheating and stealing too! But it's watered down life that I enjoy watching as a bit of a guilty pleasure.

Considering I've been in Korea, a foreign land where I can't eat what I want, can't do what I want, don't have a lot of the comforts of home, am forced to act nicely to a lot of people I don't care for, am in constant competition with other people who want the same money I want, am forced to sometimes make alliances with people I do and don't like, have watched lots of my friends go home and leave me on the peninsula, and for me and just about everyone else here, it's all about the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, I reckon I've been playing Survivor for 10 years. But I'd prefer the TV show to my version of it.

On the other hand, there are some things that consistently bug me about the show. A lot of them are probably because the participants can only be Americans, and not being American, some of the things they do boggle my mind! There'd probably be some of the same things and some different if there were a Canadian Survivor. Although the first prize would likely be an Amana Radar Range or a Brother Sewing Machine. Ha ha ha. Canadian game shows! So cheap! Anyhoo, here is my list of things that bug me about Survivor.

10. I like Jeff Probst. He's a good host and although a lot of his questions are most likely written for him by sociologists or whatever, I've seen him do some pretty good thinking on his feet. However, he has a speech impediment! How does a guy get the best job in the world, most of it requiring speech when he can NOT say "skull" or "ultimate" or "ultra". Skoal, oltimate, oltra. I think it was Survivor 12 in Panama when they had an Exile Island named Skull Island and the challenges often had skull themes, I nearly muted the show a few times. I kept getting an odd urge for a pinch of chewing tobacco between my cheek and gums. (Skoal) And it usually bugs me when he says the most often heard redundancy in TV, "Once again, immunity is one more time, back, again, up for grabs another time." Okay I added some but saying immunity is once again back up for grabs is like saying AM in the morning or basic fundamentals or honest truth or round circle, or soda pop or any of several that bugged people so much THIS list was made. I know it's a small thing but it's number 10.

9. During the final episodes called the reunion episodes where the people gather to read the votes and see who wins the million bucks, everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY is wearing WAY too much make-up. And it's not just because we're used to seeing them in their natural states. Survivor is never going to win any awards for make-up if there are any in TV. I know they have Academy Awards for make-up artists. Even the dudes get plastered with product. Sometimes it's so bad it looks like they used Homer Simpson's make-up gun! I think the worst two examples ever were Ozzie, who shoulda WON Survivor Cook Islands, (DAMMIT!), and Steph, ALL THREE times she was on! She is PLENTY hot enough without make-up!

8. There has never been a Survivor in which people weren't constantly talking about how they need protein or food energy to perform well in challenges, yet, aside from Survivor 14 in Fiji where it was survival vs. THRIVAL, and the team with all the luxuries like food won every challenge, I am POSITIVE, (and I've seen 'em all), that the hungry tribes have won more than their share of challenges. The survivors who go on reward challenges that include meals just don't have the killer instinct they might if they weren't recently full to satiety. This is why athletes NEVER eat before games. Fighters have been known to starve themselves in other ways, if you know what I'm saying. No nookie turns a pugilist into a murderer who might bite off your ear or threaten to eat your children.

7. I absolutely hate watching the episodes where the survivors get letters from home or relatives visiting the island or whatever. Almost EVERYBODY cries. When somebody DOESN'T cry, I am usually a much bigger fan of theirs. It's a month, probably less, away from your family. Survivor lasts 39 days and it's usually before day 30 that they have these episodes. Who among the survivors has never WISHED for a month away from their families? I always wonder if they're not just playing it up to get some sort of sympathy votes or to look sensative in the eyes of the viewing audience. For a wife or husband or especially a kid I could understand a bit more but it happens with Moms, Dads, friends, I think some of the survivors would have cried in the arms of locals that were hired because Survivor couldn't track down any loved ones. Do average American families see their Moms and Dads every month? Every single month? And if it's longer than that do they blubber and wimper like Lucille Ball when they meet? I guess this is part of that UNreality the cameras add. If it's not, it sure gives me doubts about the intestinal fortitude of the average American! If I want waterworks I'll watch the Biggest Loser. I wish they'd lose these episodes, but millions disagree. I dunno. I don't get it.

6. This one is one I'm usually entertained by, but in principal it bugs me. It's those sore losers on the jury who lambaste the final two or three for lying, cheating, stealing, breaking promises and doing immoral things, BETTER or SOONER than they did. I find that people who play honest games are almost always proud of the way they played and the fact that they can sleep well at night is reward enough for them. It HAS to be cuz let's face it, they never win! The ones who make fools of themselves reading the riot act to the people who make it all the way to final tribal council are almost always people who either failed at the deceit game or didn't get a chance to employ it. I think this is A LOT like life. Probably the best example is Sue from Survivor 1 and All Stars who went ballistic on both shows.

5. There is almost always some loser at the very end who did absolutely nothing while people were falling like dominoes around, (usually), her. Someone who is useless in challenges, has no charisma, did little or no game playing or manipulating, is lacking in social skills, intelligence, athleticism and even sometimes work ethic, but made some very fortunate alliance early in the game with a powerhouse player or two who keeps, (for the most part), her around because she'll be easy to beat in the final two or three. Then when the jury criticizes her for all that she says, "I must have played the game better than you since I'm here and you're on the jury." Even Probst has said it a few times! I suppose Sue would qualify from Survivor 1. Tina won Survivor 2 because of Colby. Was voted off first in All Stars. Kim from Survivor Africa rode coattails all the way as Big Tom said. Then Survivor 4 the final TWO were people who fit the category. One coattail rider and one who flip flopped any time people came to her with a new alliance. She never proposed an alliance, never worked, naver really made friends, was terrible in challenges but because of a purple rock she got a mil. Danielle and Arse, (Aras) were a useless final two and stole the game from one of the best ever survivors: Terry. Actually, no, Arse was pretty good. Just an arse. I could go on and on... But here again Survivor is very much like life. And we'll go to number 4 for the next one...

4. The person who deserves to win almost never does. In fact the person who wins almost never deserves to. I'll give you a list that I think would be very well accepted as the people who were the smartest/most athletic/best social players/hardest workers and had a winning combinations of assets that SHOULD have won them the game. 1. Greg (9th), 2. Colby (2nd), 3. Tom (4th)though I think Ethan deserved the win, 4. Hunter (13th), 5. Brian (1st time!), 6. Matthew (2nd) 7. Rupert (6th), 8. Lex (9th), 9. Sarge (9th), 10. Tom (2nd and last time!), 11. Steph (2nd), 12. Terry (3rd), 13. Ozzy (2nd), 14. Yau Man (4th), 15. Chicken (lol okay maybe some would disagree with this), and so on. This year it'll probably be the same. But that's life.

3. As in life when people say stupid things to reason away the travesty of the inept rising to power and wealth while the worthy get shafted such as, "It's just business," "Don't take it personally," "Just trying to feed my family," or other such crap, Survivor has its own version: "It's a game!" Hey, it's NOT a game! There's a million dollars PLUS on the line. Nothing could be farther from the truth. These guys are all playing for endorsement deals, public appearances, vehicles, the easy life. It's not a game. People just say that when they've realized they don't deserve to win as much as someone else so they lied, cheated or stole. Once again, just like life! The greatest example of this was when the appropriately named Dreamz made a deal with Yao Man that in exchange for about a 60,000 dollar vehicle, if he won immunity for the final 4, he'd give it to Yao Man. Dreamz had that same money sickness that causes businessmen/women to say, "It's just business." He somehow DREAMED that after shafting the most deserving guy in the game he'd get even ONE vote from the jury. Of course he didn't and has been lying his ass off ever since saying it was his "game" strategy. I call BS because he wouldn't have sworn to God right away when Yao Man proposed the deal OR talked about how proud his kid would be of him when he turned over immunity to YM. He was only talking to the camera when he said that so it absolutely COULD NOT have been strategy. Was it his strategy to lie to the viewing audience? Dangle money in front of some people and just sit back and watch the show. A million bucks makes for some real entertainment!

2. I absolutely hate it when people ally based on sex. For the men it's a bit more understandable because they are better suited for a lot of the challenges. But the WOMAN POWER alliances really bug me. This is one of the big reasons why we end up with so many duds at the end of a lot of seasons. But even worse I hate when the races hook up. For a long time if there were two black people on Survivor, you could bank on them hooking up. Even the one time when Ghandia accused Ted of sexual harrassment, they were a brothah/sistah alliance beforehand. The most obvious example to me would be the alliance of Yul and Becky the two Koreans. They were talking about how they had such a "strong bond" from like day 2? Two things have caused that kind of "bond" in the history of Survivor: A rockin' bod and racism. And since they were very clear about not ever thinking of each other in those terms after the season ended, I think we know what it was that brought them together. And knowing Koreans and the way they feel about the importance of blood, how they have special words for racist ideas in Korean like "jeong" the special love only Koreans can share, it's a no-brainer. Quite fitting that a racist-based alliance won the season where the tribes were initially separated by race.

1. The thing I hate worst about Survivor is what I call the "blah blahs." These are those people who say stuff like, "If I put my mind to it I can blah blah blah." "I believe that there's nothing I can't do if blah blah blah." And so on. These hyperpositive and hyperconfident people almost NEVER turn out to be even close to as good or fast or socially adept or funny as they claim in their hooray-for-me, self-congratulatory back slapping. And Americans have never been accused of having too LITTLE confidence in themselves. Watching this Dunning/Kruger effect and witnessing the absolute crash and burn failure of its sufferers is almost as sweet as watching the truly good players win. I'm not actually sure which I like better. This Dunning/Kruger effect is only theory but that's why it's so fun to watch. It really looks to be evident. It's basically when someone has an illusion that they are really good when in fact they suck. But the same delusionary thinking that makes them think they're good at something is what keeps them from realizing they suck. They also judge others to be of similar judgement and ability to them. It also works in reverse with the great players. They usually underestimate their abilities and overestimate the abilities of others to be about on par with their own. Probably the best example of the former was Rocky. He won exactly nothing but if you asked him about his performance on Survivor he'd probably tell you he was dominant. And almost every season you'll have people who compare themselves in their profiles to past survivors. Like I'm as devious as Russel or as funny as Tyson. They're usually nothing close. Of course it doesn't work for everybody! Russel thought he was the smartest guy alive and it was sweet to see him proven wrong. Tyson was absolutely in love with himself too. Then there's Boston Rob. But they weren't blah blahs. They had some game to back up their cocky talk so I dislike them slightly less. But the thing I like the least is also the thing I like the most. Guys like Ozzy, Tom, Rupert, Rodger, Paschal, Ethan, Greg, Hunter, and QB Gary had the positive D/K effect. So did girls like Steph, Amanda, Danni, Kathy, Sandra, Helen, Elisabeth, Colleen. But I'm not talking about the things I like best about Survivor. The blah blahs make it tedious sometimes. Especially when watching alone and I can't slag them to someone else. Oh I still do but there's nobody around to hear me. Maybe I need a dog.

Anyhoo, that's what's got me typing this time. Nothing much happening since last entry. See ya next time.

Korea is a funny place

These days there are all kinds of ads for jobs in the major universities that don't start until March 1st. Why are they advertising so early? Because xenophobic paranoia has led to hastily enacted rules that require foreigners to jump through a lot more hoops before they can be legally employed here. New laws that are being enforced by people who think they might possibly have forgotten to actually read them but they think they can probably, almost, partly figure out the implied, intended spirit of them.

For example, the criminal record check I got 2 years ago from the Calgary Police force that accessed national records and said that I had not committed any crimes in the country of Canada is no longer any good here. In fact, I understand that even if it were valid, I'd have to get another one because 2 years is too old. Regardless of the fact that I have lived in Korea for the past 5 years so could not have committed any crimes in Canada, prior to that was employed at schools in Canada that required more stringent criminal record checks than Korean schools, and even had high level security clearance in Canada because I actually worked FOR THE RCMP, the agency at which they are forcing me to apply for my new Criminal Record Check. None of this means anything to the people of Korea because a few attrocities have been committed and rules have been broken and because they were attrocities committed and rules bent by foreigners, made big news, so now the entire country thinks there is a good chance all ESL teachers here are potential child molesters with fake degrees.

So I have to get a new CRC, which takes about 4-6 months, and I need to get my degree verified for the umpteenth time. You see every few years the Korean government notices a rash of Korean people who have attained high positions on the strength of phony degrees. So what is the appropriate thing to do? Why, get all the foreigners to have their degrees verified at their own expense, of course! It has cost me 40 bucks twice to get my degree verified at immigration. It cost me more than that once to have sealed transcripts mailed to my employer. And schools I worked for have verified my degree themselves on a few occasions. Not good enough! Now I need to get it verified, by my employer, through the Korean Council for Universities Association. No doubt this will cost me some more dough.

The cost for the new federal CRC through the Canadian RCMP will be 25 Canadian dollars. It can only be paid by certified check or money order. Well, foreigners can't get certified checks in Korea undoubtedly because one or two people sent their money home via certified check and Koreans have this drastic aversion to that practice. My Korean friend who had a business in Korea for several years is moving to Canada and has no idea how she will transfer her money there. And she's KOREAN! Foreigners can no longer use credit cards or debit cards to access THEIR money in Korean banks even though the bankers will always tell you they are international cards and even put phony Cirrus/Maestro or whatever stamps on them. They don't work. And if you take cash out of a Korean bank, go to another country and find a Korea Exchange Bank, they will not exchange the Korean cash for you.

And there are other problems too. New rules for foreigners needing their alien cards to do practically everything in this country. I couldn't even get into the country on a tourist visa without having a ticket out even though the immigration officer told me I could. YES, immigration officers and bank tellers actually ARE being trained to lie to foreigners. Not really a new practice but it IS new policy. Also, in order to use my bank account in Korea I need to continuously update my bank book. The other day I tried to do that and was asked by the teller to show her my alien card. I have no alien card but showed her my passport and my visitor's visa that is good till the end of February. She updated my book and froze my account. New policy. FURTHERMORE, if you are trying to get a job here and need the CRC you must find a bank somewhere, (and good luck with this one!), that can give you a Canadian money order. Most tellers don't know what they are and will lie to you and tell you their bank doesn't issue them. If this happens you need to go to another teller and maybe another teller, (possibly in the same bank), until you finally get one who knows what money orders are. THEN you need to ask for CANADA dollars because they don't know what Canadian dollars are. And you might even have to use the letters O.D.D. because this is the term used only in Korea for something that is used only by foreigners who have never heard of it. THEN after all of that they may ask you once again for your alien card to get the money order needed for the CRC needed to get the job needed to get the work visa needed to actually get an alien card. In short, if you don't have a job in Korea, you can't apply for one because you need an alien card to get an alien card. New policy!

But none of this matters to Koreans either. So long as they think they are safe from the .0001% of foreigners who are nasty to Koreans. Why would any foreigner be nasty to Koreans?

I, and plenty of my colleagues, am suffering through all of this craziness that almost seems designed with the sole purpose of making things as tough for foreigners as possible, for the right to work at facilities with slogans like "Global Elite," "Global Future," "Globalization For Tomorrow," "We Love Foreigners," and other such irony. I admit I made up that last one. We are stringently abiding by Korean laws, being fingerprinted, scanned and interrogated to make sure we haven't so much as jaywalked in our lives to work at institutions that routinely practice academic fraud, degree selling, cheat on standardized testing, fudge attendance and marks and ask or even REQUIRE us to do so as well. We are forced to verify our credentials on about a bi-annual basis for the honour of working at these institutions who commonly maintain 75% minimum grades for all students and hand out "diplomas" and "degrees" to people who haven't even shown up for class.

Not only that but the trend is now toward accepting only teachers with Master's degrees in related fields like TESOL, TEFL, Linguistics etc. AND they are paying less and less money.

What do you suppose will be the end result of all of this? I know, because over the 10 years I've spent here this sort of thing has just been snowballing. What is going to happen is the businesses, (and make no mistake, it is erroneous to call them schools), will need these Master's-holding teachers because they have promised them to the parents of their prospective students, (who are notoriously knocked out by letters after a person's name), but the teachers won't be available BECAUSE 1. it's too hard to jump through all the hoops, 2. Koreans don't like foreigners and make it obvious, 3. if a guy gets a good degree the first place he'll try to use it WON'T be Korea. So the businesses, not the teachers, the businesses will get to work forging fake documentation for workers they hire at their schools. The government will eventually find out but will not punish the Koreans, rather the foreigners will be disciplined and deported and it will make all the TV news reports, newspapers and Korean media and we'll be at it ONE MORE TIME. In my career here this is the 3rd discernable cycle of this that I have noticed.

It's a funny, funny place this country they call Korea! That's why some clever foreigner invented "OINK!" which means Only IN Korea!

"Can There Be a Science of Good and Evil?"

Lookie here, another blog entry inspired by the Daily Show! It's such a great show though! I sure hope Jon Stewart can restore sanity to the world! Recently he had on a guest who had written a new book. It was one I was particularly interested in called "The Moral Landscape." It's written by the guy who also wrote "The End of Faith," Sam Harris. He was introduced by Jon Stewart as a professional atheist. His new book is an attempt to convince you and me that science is a source of moral values. Something a professional atheist will give a completely non-biased opinion of to be sure!

I haven't read the book but I have been thinking about this issue a lot lately. I actually brought it up in conversation a few times with people I socialize with here. It's a touchy issue. Even if people AGREE with you they will argue with you on this. It's really weird. I had a guy tell me he is a scientist AND a Christian and then after a litany of argumentative points that supported exactly the opinion I had stated, he said he didn't think there WERE any scientists who didn't believe in God. Because we had already monopolized conversation I didn't mention Harris, Richard Dawkins or most recently and famously Steven Hawking. But it was a good example of how science and morality have become such enemies. Harris is trying to help the world by showing them that the answers to our problems can be found in simple science and we need not stray to the slippery slope of morality to solve our problems and maximize our well being.

He's the same age as me and judging from his education and experience I'd definitely say he's got a LOT more knowledge on this than I do but he DOES say some silly, silly things! Child-like simplicity from such an educated man that is most likely the result of the training that keeps us from seeing the truth about this whole issue. So fascinating! Maybe he has spent too much time in the classroom and not enough time actually socializing because people just don't think like this. We can't create, or arguably even conceive of a sterile environment devoid of moral decisions. Plenty of great, SCIENCE FICTION has been written about such societies but they will never exist.

He makes some great points and has a knack for turning a phrase. For example when he talks about the culture war between secular liberals and Christian conservatives he says that "a shared beleif in the limitations of reason lies at the bottom of these cultural divides." I agree. And the word, "science," as it so often is, can be substituted here for "reason." Like the unscientific never use reason...

In his article, "Can There Be a Science of Good and Evil", he includes "mistrust of science" in a list of attributes such as "intolerance of diversity" that are generally agreed upon to be morally reprehensible and just assumes that the entire world would put it right there with him. It's so odd from a man who is a proponent of scientific skepticism to not apply his scientific skepticism to science itself! This is what I mean when I say he's fascinating. He has a degree in neuroscience. These guys have done some incredible mapping of the brain. But for some reason old Sam seems to think he's working with the mind. Trying to use the mind to explain the mind. A walking, writing fountain of irony this guy!

He lists gay marriage, stem cell research, anti-blasphemy laws, and abortion as issues that have unnecessarily distracted politicians that arise from conservative dogmatism and liberal doubt. As though conservatives have cornered the market on dogmatism and liberals on doubt. I have a strong conservative doubt that the mind will ever figure out the mind and quantify things like instinct, emotion, creativity, human nature and such. We can see it exists, even scientifically measure it, but we can't explain the first thing about why or how we do it. But liberal dogmatism consistently purports psychology, sociology, neuroscience and others as hard scientific studies of fact when all they really amount to is formulation of theories about what is going on in the mind. They preach not from the pulpit but the lectern and disguise theory as fact for the purposes of self-legitimization and to keep their courses from being offered under the faculty of arts.

Who but someone with an unshakeable faith in science could separate morality from issues like those listed above? Oh I know, a legalistic religious person. Here's a great little tidbit that ties things nicely together: a scientific study was done recently that shows most atheists know more about religion than religious people. I got that from the Daily Show too. It's all about faith. The atheist studies and finds out all he/she can about religion so he/she can scientifically disprove it in his/her mind. The legalistic religious person doesn't need to know all that stuff because he/she has God and a hard, fast list of rules. My point is, guys like old Sam Harris and all the faithful scientists are not that different from the legalistic fanatics they write off all spiritual people as. Indeed if a scientific study could be done on which of the two has MORE faith I have no doubt the scientists would win hands down.

But back to Sam Harris's reasoning. He puts forth a charming little pre-school argument in which there are only two people on the earth. He mockingly names them Adam and Eve and asks the scientific questions, "How can they flourish?" Answer: do things that have been found to be scientifically beneficial. "How can they fail?" He gives the example that they could both punch each other in the face. The answers to all questions, he posits, will come from facts that can be scientifically understood. He goes on to ask how would the difference between right and wrong disappear when we add 6.7 billion more people to the experiment? What a very well trained, and absurdly out of touch with reality, scientist he is! No need to use morality, just do the things we can agree to be for our best interests. Indeed, this may have been the way things were BEFORE Eve ate the apple, but it just ain't that way any more.

Let's just think of one of a gozillion different wrenches that can be thrown into this simplistic little piece of scientific, escapist dogma. Let's say Adam, (this time), were to wander off one day and find a tree full of delicious fruit that neither he nor Eve had ever tried before. Will he share the fruit or keep it all for himself. BOTH could be argued to be beneficial. First let's look at the results with the extra 6.7 billion people. Scientifically speaking, we have already done this experiment and the scientific evidence gleaned from the acquisitive, competitive and just plain selfish ideals that are instilled in the overwhelming majority of the 6.7 billion people of Earth indicates that Adam should keep the tree a secret. That's science.

But if it were just Adam and Eve why wouldn't Adam double the happiness or "well being" and halve the fruit? In fact the happiness he gets from the joy of sharing may outweigh the half of the fruit he lost. The fruit is renewable. And future benefits can be derived from the generous nature Eve sees in the action of sharing. Also, what if Eve discovers the secret? Adam may have to lie or change his actions to maintain the secret. He may carry some guilt about hogging all the fruit. Eve could bust him and bring to an abrupt end their peaceful coexistence. So why does Adam keep the tree a secret? You know he would if science is any indication. We can only postulate that it's greed. Maybe greed is more instinctive than sharing.

Or maybe Adam will just understand that sharing is the right thing to do and it made him feel good. This in my estimation, and those of most intellectual moralists, (who Sammy and most of his ilk seem to forget about in their teachings), is the only REAL way to make Adam and Eve thrive and maximize their well being in this instance. But there is absolutely nothing scientific about it. It is in Harris' own words, "positive change in the experience of sentient creatures" and it is brought about by psychological, moral and therefore absolutely unquantifiable and unscientific decision.

And the thousands of other moral decisions Adam and Eve would have to make every single day should not be the result of a bunch of rules derived from thousands of replicated scientific studies, or a bunch of rules derived from thousands of years of religious tradition. We can not say that a newly discovered tribe in the Amazon is wrong for sacrificing their first born children to imaginary gods, nor can we say that a woman is wrong for aborting a fetus. We can only try to do the right thing. And I think if we can just separate the good teaching from the proselytization and be honest with ourselves, (that's the hard part), just about everybody has it in themselves to make the right decisions.

Who even knows if what's wrong for me might be the right thing to do for someone else? I think maybe one of the most important moral decisions we can ever make is not to be judgemental. As you can see, I have yet to gain the spiritual maturity to become comfortable with that one. I should just let Sam Harrison believe his scientific legalism and say a salut! Good for you. Do what makes you happy. We all really should, shouldn't we? Unless what makes you happy is bad for somebody else, like fighting wars, or making a billion dollars a year through slave labour, or depleting the world's resources for personal financial gain, or participating in corrupt governments, or...

Why are the rich depressed and the poor so happy? At what stage of development does a person become a person so that killing them is wrong? How much does a person have to bug me before I can morally commit post natal abortion? Is euthenasia okay? When should I allow my daughter to date? How old do I have to be before dating a 20-year-old becomes creepy, and how much oldER do I have to be before it becomes cute again? Is suicide bombing a meeting of the richest 100 people in the world an immoral fantasy? I certainly don't want to trust any of these decisions to science. I can't even see how science could be very much help. There will always be a need for moral decisions to be made and there will always be those who disagree and worse, those who disagree and want to force you to agree with them. The trick is to try to take joy in the trials of existence. If we could all live a life of moral relativism where every behaviour was mandated by rules, life would be a stone cold drag and I think it would be purposeless.

So the best answer to your question, Sammy boy, is NOPE.

But that's just my opinion.

Good news America!

This is going to be a post that a lot of my myriad readers will differ with. Maybe even take offense to. Don't worry, it's not bad news. It's good news!

I live in Korea and STILL I'm constantly hearing about the American "recession." Some people have even had the nerve to label it a "depression" already. You know how much time I spend in sorrow for America? None. In fact the panic stricken new anchors using scarily diving charts and graphs and proporting doom and gloom are just a beautiful illustration of exactly why the "recession" is good for America.

Let me splain. There's this new thing called globalization. Maybe you've heard of it. It's unstoppable. It's going to continue. With technology allowing other countries around the world to share all markets it's going to be good for just about everybody. American businesspeople already know that when you go to a foreign country you can give jobs to citizens and make them very happy. Jobs that pay them a tiny fraction of what you have to pay Americans. You COULD, (but come on, chuckle snicker why would you?), even lower the price of your product so it sells even BETTER. THIS part of globalization is quite familiar to America. For years they've been doing this and for years profits have increased by a fairly steady percentage every year.

But now, other countries are doing this. And other countries ARE pricing their products lower. They are becoming more competitive so that the regular increases in American business are harder to maintain. Companies in rich countries are vigourously searching for poorer and poorer countries to exploit- um, er, I mean give the privelege of building factories in. But there are only so many countries on the earth. It eventually had to happen: soon even American companies will be forced to charge more reasonable prices for their goods because they are only increasing their profits at maybe half the usual rate. The panic-stricken news reporters are trained to call this "loss" for companies. And when many companies report these "losses" it's called a "recession." It makes it easier for CEO's and people at the top of American companies to ease the "losses" by "downsizing", devaluing stock and things like that and at the same time maintaining a steady increase in THEIR standards of living while their companies have fallen on hard times. This is how so many "downturns" and "fiscal hardships" and things like that are happening yet companies are still managing to stay afloat. The companies you see going tits up are the ones that just refuse to charge reasonable rates for their products or take pay cuts. They'd rather go out of business, which can actually be more profitable for them.

This is hugely oversimplified but what it boils down to is what Americans have spent their entire existence training their citizens NOT to do: share. The world is now sharing. How many years has America made a gozillion bucks more than any other country? It seems the businesspeople of America, (and, yes other rich countries too including Canada), somehow expected that the money to even economies out around the world was going to come from somewhere else. And let's not overstate the case. It's going to be a VERY long time before things are even.

The countries that have been cheap labour for the rich countries have learned how to make stuff, saved their meagre salaries and now are producing goods themselves. But they are poor countries. They don't need to charge the outrageous prices that rich countries like America does for the same products. So everybody stops buying from the rich countries and buys from the poor. I think this is great! It's awesome how not everything is made in China or Taiwan or Japan or America any more. It's fun to look at the tags on things now to see where they're made.

Now here's the good news. I'm sure, like me, you've seen all the poles and studies that show how happy various countries around the world are. It's always the poor countries who are at the top and the rich are at the bottom. Well I've also seen first hand how happy people are in their poverty. And there's no end to the evidence of how miserable Americans are! Half the country is on one anti-depressant or another. Do you think it might have something to do with all these people joining the ratrace, or in American terms, "chasing the American dream," working long hours under highly stressful conditions trying to keep up with the Joneses and support their families rather than raise them?

Americans must buy their children rooms full of toys, pay for lessons in sports, music, martial arts, dancing etc. to keep them entertained while the majority of the world has their kids at home with them. And they have time to spend with them, cuz they aren't working 80-hour weeks. Or sometimes they just tell their kids to quit whining about being bored and get the hell outside. Where they develop socially, use their imaginations, and learn life lessons while playing with the other "poor" kids. Maybe this can partly explain why even the KIDS in America are depressed!

I was watching the first episode of the new Apprentice show. It's a "recession" Apprentice in which every contestant had some job making multi-million dollar business deals and now they're on unemployment or working a regular job like driving a bus or something. They're failures! They just can't support their families any more on mere hundreds of thousands a year. Woe, woe, woe to the American recession victims! Please!

Take it as good news, America. As your economy gets "destroyed" and you are forced to sell the yacht and maybe the fourth car or second house, you'll be all the happier for it. And maybe your kids will too! Unemployment is relaxing. Working part time frees up a lot of schedule slots to spend with family. THEN maybe, just maybe, you'll realize that all these scare tactics like having news reporters tell you how dire the economy is, how evil socialism is, how important it is to be a good "provider," and the list could go on and on, were all just mind massage to keep you productive, if clinically depressed citizens. And let countries like Bangladesh, Cambodia, and Costa Rica share some of the sorrow that comes with riches. It's all part of the SHARING of globalization.

Or maybe not. I dunno.

Survivor Nicaragua: Predictions

Another Survivor has started and it's looking interesting already. cbs.com has chosen to discontinue allowing people who are from other countries like Korea, or, I'm guessing, Nicaragua, to access the pre-Survivor videos they have to introduce us to the competitors. I found these to be very helpful the last few seasons in pre-judging the competitors and writing about them here. Now when I try to watch them a message comes up saying that they aren't available to people in my area.

So I chose to wait an entire episode before I tell you everything you need to know about these people. Also I've been warming up. I have been watching the first Survivor series on disks my good buddy Scott gave me. I didn't realize how much I'd missed. So this will undoubtedly prepare me to give you my personal snap judgements on all the people in Survivor Nicaragua. Age before beauty?

Espada tribe. (Oldsters)

Jimmy J - Gotta start with the oldest. He's a legend. Won college football championships as a player and coach then topped it off with a couple superbowls while coaching Dallas. A lot of the survivors will know him. I don't think he's a threat for the very reason he gave: NObody will give him the mil. He's already got several. If the oldsters are smart they'll keep him around for his coaching value. THEY might not need it as much, being older and wiser, but when the tribes merge, if they do, he'll probably have some major influence on the younger and more impressionable. I think a lot of his tribemates, like Jimmy T. and Marty are unwisely seeing this as a bad thing because they think he is actually trying to win the million. He's not. He might want the title of Survivor champ but if he DID win I think he'd give the money to one of the other competitors. He's PSYCHED for this. He says he's watched every minute of Survivor and he got the nervous butterfly heaves in the first episode. Something he probably saw from a lot of his players who were psyched to play games. I hope he lasts a while but think he's already a marked man. He's a proven winner but I think that's gonna be more of a detriment to him.

Danny Lembo- He looks like a mobster but that may not be a bad thing. Mob mentality could work in this game. Boston Rob tried to use it in Survivor IV in Tahiti. See? The research is paying off already. He's a real estate exec. who says he's very "connected" so he is probably trying to play up his mobster appearance. He says he'll be aggressive, cunning and devious and he'll thrive on beating everyone else. Hates modern politicians but idolizes Ronald Reagan. Reagan was an actor and this guy may be too. He does look the part though.

Jane Bright- A dog trainer who is hoping to be best in show. I'm sorry, that was too easy. lol. Says she's loveable like Rupert but smarter. Rupert was pretty darn smart so she's got to live up to her name. Lost her husband and wants to pay off her farm with the money. Says she's always busy, hates lazy folks and doesn't toodle around the house. She got the fire going right away. Listened to Probst when he said people who can't start fire shouldn't go on the show. That revved up her tribe. Marty said it reassured him that they are gonna win this thing. Southern drawl, gap-toothed farmer and the third oldest in the game. Might be underestimated and not voted for. I think she'll be strong and I think I like her already so others will too. She wants to "win America over" and I think she will. A VERY good shot to win this thing.

Jimmy T- He's a commercial fisherman with a low tolerance for imcompetence. He's already shown a hot temper, ("I'm not gonna NOT be heard here!"), on a tribe full of older people who you'd expect to be a bit more competent than, say, Fabio on the La Flor tribe. He'd better rein that in or he won't be long for Nicaragua. He won a nationwide contest to be on the show so I guess he's got some qualities America will like. But I have a feeling they're backing the wrong pony here. He's volatile and a bit of a jerk from early indications. I don't know what he's got against Jimmy J. but he made a point of telling everybody he was voting his ass off. Who does that before the first tribal council? Maybe he's an Eagles fan. Or maybe he's jealous. thought he'd be the celebrity but is "just another player here." He'll be gone fast if the oldsters are wisesters.

Marty Piombo- He's a tech. exec. whatever that means. Rescued a guy in the mountains in the winter. I didn't see any snowy mountains in the first episode unfortunately for him. Likes Lance Armstrong and says he'll be a cross between Boston Rob and Russel. Two of the best players of this game who I think would be the biggest assholes outside the game. I loved them on the show though. They added SO much! After Rob was ousted from the Marquesas I almost stopped watching. It was nice to see the good guys win that episode but I lost almost all interest after episode 8 after Rob and John said bye bye. It got boooo RING! I'm hoping Marty will keep this season interesting and be one of the villains. Called Wendy weird and I gotta agree with that. Has no idea why Jimmy J is there but was very fake friendly to him. Should be fun to watch this guy.

Wendy Jo- Goat rancher? Used to be a Lt. Col. in the army? And what was that get-up she was sporting? Did she think the first challenge would be barrel riding? She is one of the people I love to hate on Survivor that I call the blah blahs. People who are busy trying to convince themselves that "if you put your heart and mind to it you can do any.. blah blah blah..." While some people really believe in the power of positive thinking my opinion is that actions speak louder than words. The more positive you SAY you are that you are gonna succeed, the bigger a dick you appear when you fail. Winners don't need to constantly remind themselves and others how positive they are and how successful they are going to be. On the other hand, she was "blah blah blah" in another way. Her stated strategy was to put a muzzle on her yappety yap. Said she didn't want to gab gab gab and drive everybody cuh razy. How long did THAT last? She talked herself right off the show at the first tribal council.

Holly Hoffman- Swim coach twice voted coach of the year. Says that gives her a real knack for judging people accurately on first impression. She went right for Wendy cuz she got a "good vibe" from her. Then after Jimmy J. talked with her she questioned that alliance and avoided her till she voted her off. And at tribal council told EVERYBODY about the alliance like a dumbass. So far not so good.

Dr. Jill- An ER doctor. "How could I NOT be the sole survivor?" If she's an ER doc, I'm sure she has leadership skills and is good at organizing and working under pressure. She could NOT be the sole survivor by blending into the background and NOT using those skills. Like she did in episode 1. Where the hell was she? On the other hand she didn't screw anything up. The only good thing I saw from her was calling Jane "Survivor McGuyver."

Tyrone Davis- Fire captain. Inspired by God and parents. Hates plastic people. "If I want it, I'll get it done blah blah blah..." Could this guy be a bigger stereotype? I hope he shows us something more like his reaction to Wendy telling America her age: "You look so young!" (eye roll). And I liked when he said, "Wendy Jo gotta go." I think he'll be a boring nice guy but if he lets his badass flag fly I'm gonna like him.

Yve Rojas- Homemaker. Unassuming. Her daughters are her life. I think she'll be one of those bawling her eyes out at any mention of being apart from family. They always mystify me. How many people would PAY a million bucks for a 39-day break from their families? Hates not being acknowledged when she speaks. She won't have to worry about that because she doesn't speak that much. Was called on by Probst and said she could tell a lot about people and how they're checking each other out. Maybe THAT'S what she was doing the whole episode. Didn't notice her at all.

La Flor (Youngsters)

Kelly Shinn- Youngest and probably the hottest of this group. She's a nursing student/homecoming queen. She plans to play the popularity game although I think she might be outplayed at THAT by Brenda. Hates dirty fingernails. If she means her own I think she might be a lazy one. She'll need to look her best to overcome that. Didn't see much of her in episode one other than it looked like her blonde hair had black roots. I think going blonde is a pretty good strategy if that is what it was.

Jud "Fabio" Birza- Could give Robb from Survivor Thailand a run for the STUPIDEST survivor ever. Already parallels like foot injuries and boarding. He's a drummer for a band called Space Funk Odyssey. Says he's a good swimmer. Better than Ozzy. He'd better be cuz he won't be solving any of the brain teasers. When Kelly B revealed her prosthetic leg he said, "How do you tell it to move?" I hope one of the other band members write the lyrics for Space Funk Odyssey.

Alina Wilson- Listed Paris Hilton as her inspiration. Of course she was joking. Doesn't like people calling her "sweetie" or "hun." I'm like that too. Especially from strangers it's just a blatant attempt to gain dominance. Don't call me that unless I've known you a long time. But then she said, "Nothing stops me when I put my mind to...blah blah blah..." Noticed Kelly B's limp and said, "She might have a hip problem?" Then found the clue to the hidden idol with her and wished she had found it alone. I liked that she doesn't want to be associated with Kelly B because she will get a sympathy vote. I think I might like her despite being a blah blah.

Ben Henry (Benry)- Club promoter. Runs 2 businesses. He's out to show the world what it's like to be a winner. "If you look good you play good and you get paid good." Obviously very cocky. High 5ed everybody and introduced himself as Benry when the young tribe got to camp but didn't notice him after that. I'm sure we'll see more of his cockiness in later episodes.

Chase Rice- Pro Race Car Jackman. He figures people will trust him cuz he's a southerner. He might be right because instantly Shannon set up an alliance with him. He agreed with Shannon that they don't want a woman winning this thing. Then moments later Brenda said she liked his "spirit." Had intended to play an honest game but Brenda blew that with her womanly wiles. He's hooked, poor guy. Says for some reason he "trusted" her. Now what's he gonna do? He might be smart enough to play both sides though. He said to Jud that he looked like he might be good in the water. That was a sharp observation. He's gotta choose between the woman hater and the man user. I hope this country boy just abandons BOTH his early alliances. We shall see. I think he might be a guy I pull for this season. So maybe I trust southerners too.

Kelly B- Amputee. Will get a lot of sympathy. Not only for the leg but for her Dad who recently died giving aid to Haiti. Already Shannon the misogynist has stated that he'd just give her the money if he were in the final few with her. But quickly said he'll have to make sure she doesn't make it that far. Her calling everyone together looked pretty obviously like a ploy to get the sympathy vote. I think she wasted it too early. Already a lot of people are saying that her prosthetic leg won't change anything. NaOnka wants a foot race; Tyrone says they both have the same rules; Alina wishes she didn't have to share the immunity clue with her. But it looks like she might not need the sympathy. She's an Iron Man Triathlon finisher. Found the immunity idol clue with Alina and they were, in her own words, "stumped" by it. I didn't say it, she did! At any rate I think she'll be capable but whether she can turn a weakness into a strength or vice versa will be the barometer on how long she sticks around.

Brenda Lowe- Probst and I got the same impression from this hotty: "She is a sort of black widow." She already looks like she wants her first victim to be Chase. Says she's "used to guys doing what she says." "Chase likes me but he's clueless." She better hope so. I could see Shannon cluing in to the alliance and advising Chase against it. She's another blah blah. "Nothing stops me when I get an idea into my blah blah blah..." Very easy for beauty pageant winners to say. But I don't think she'll just depend on the boys to carry her along. Found the golden medallion and climbed a tree to get it. So she's not helpless on her own. But her mouth and the confidence to use it that comes to beauty pageant winners might be her undoing. When asked if she would have used the golden medallion for the challenge she instantly said the oldsters were wrong not to have used it. She further schooled them on how they have to "...think of now, not tomorrow. You're here to win!" I think she'll be a bad girl but she won't be able to hide it well enough. Won't last long if she can't.

NaOnka Mixon- P.E. teacher. No kids. Loves dogs. I am TOTALLY on her side after these three facts! Doesn't feel any sympathy for Kelly B. Bring her on! But she IS worried about others giving her sympathy. Haven't seen much of her yet but I think she might be a strong sister. If she doesn't go overboard, like the stereotypical strong sister, I'll be pulling for her.

Matthew "Sash" Lenahan- Supposed to be funny. Says he's like Tyson with the one-liners. I've noticed a pattern on Survivor: anyone who said they were gonna be funny hasn't been. I fully expect this from Sash too. His "funniest" quote so far is, "Great beach, great waves, beautiful girls... it doesn't get much better than that, right?" Meh. Distance runner so that might help. Thinks he's awesome but he might be as awesome as he is funny. We shall see...

Shannon Elkins- I think he'll be the most interesting guy on the show. I fear that he won't be around long enough to peel back all his skins, however. He's in pest control. Obviously hates women. Has made such comments as, "We already get owned in marriage." "A guy needs to sack up and take this thing." And dreads the day he sees coming when America has a female president. Misogyny central! He will probably try to exterminate the women like as many queen insects. He hates dumb people. Instantly disliked Jud and gave him the name Fabio. I thought this was extremely interesting since Shannon looks a whole lot more like Fabio than Jud. I mean look at the body! Borrow some of Kelly S's blonde hair dye and there ya go! Says he wants to win Survivor to put another notch on his belt and that he'll be like Russel only much prettier. I'm interested in the Freudian aspects of this dude. Everyone immediately knows he hates women. Calls himself pretty and has a name more often used for girls. Instantly allied with the hunkiest of the men on his tribe. Maybe he's struggling with his own sexuality. I bet he could spend hours and hours on the couch. He will certainly add some colour to this season!

It looks like it'll be a good season! A few new things I've noticed: the age groupings, the gold medallion, an amputee, a really famous person and crotch smudges for the guys walking around in their undies. Not sure if these will make it better or worse but am looking forward to finding out.

So I vote for Chase and Jane, I don't like Benry or Holly.
Interesting villains- Shannon and Brenda.
Could last a long time- Chase, Jane, Kelly B, Marty.
Alliances to watch for: Tyrone/NaOnka brotha and sista. Hey it happens. Only time it didn't was when Ghandia tried to get, what, a sexual harrassment vote by accusing Ted? And they WERE a black alliance before that.
Danny/Dr. Jill/Yve. I don't think they will last long without some sort of alliance. Danny says he's connected so make some connections. Who better than a doctor? Yve needs somebody's coattails to ride. This alliance could make them all contenders.

Sole Survivor- Marty. The person I vote for never wins and I don't think I'll be voting for Marty. But I think he'll be a good player. He won't play good, but he'll be a good player.

Just my opinion.